To be silent is to Make no sound; quiet; still: a silent motor refraining from speech, speechless; mute, not inclined to speak; taciturn; reticent, characterized by absence of speech or sound: a silent prayer.
This morning I spent time with the Lord, in my hammock, in the beautiful country of Mozambique reading from The Book of Acts. While reading I came across a passage. “Do not be afraid, but go on speaking and do not be silent, for I am with you, and no one will attack to harm you.” (Acts 18:9-10). After reading this, I felt like God was speaking to me though this passage. For many weeks and even months while being on this mission trip, I have always questioned my speech. Questions like “Why did God make me with a speech problem?” “Does God have a plan for me and my speech to teach others with disabilities?” “Will God ever heal me?” These questions have been an ongoing war inside of my head for quite some time.
It wasn’t until today that I finally felt peace about my stutter. When it says “Do not be silent”, to me it was God’s way of saying you have a great and wonderful voice. Use the gift that I have given you to its full advantage. Don’t be afraid for I will watch and protect you. In John 9:1-3 it says, “As Jesus went along; he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents that he was born blind? “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him.” God didn’t make me stutter or anyone else stutter because of something they did, or their parents. God made me special so that others could see the works of God through me.
Growing up I had never been known as the child to be quiet or silent. As a child, after warming up to new people, I would sing, dance, and talk for hours. My parents would always tell me that as I child I never let my speech be a crutch. Yes I was teased and yes it hurt but I didn’t let that affect my childhood. As a child I could have chosen to be silent, mute, and speechless. Yet I chose to speak and to be heard.
As an adult nothing has changed, I’m still the talkative person I was as a child. I speak my mind and I don’t let people influence my speech. From the movie (The Kings Speech) “I have a voice!” I plan to use the voice I have been given. I finally came to terms that it’s ok if God chooses not to heal me. For if that’s His will, I will follow and embrace the path he has for me.
Do not be silent- Speak life
Do not be afraid- Embrace the life that has been given to you
Do not shut down- Jump for joy
