We’re at English Day Camp. My ministry host turns to my teammate and I and says, “We need more balloons. Can you untie these balloons?” “Umm, sure…” we reply and the struggle begins.
During this season of the race, I’ve been asked numerous times the question “what are you doing after the race?” I’ve prayed a lot about this question. For the last month I’ve asked and waited for God to answer this question. And to tell you the honest truth, I don’t know the answer to this question and that scares the crap out of me.
In Jeremiah 33:3, it says, “Ask me and I will tell you remarkable secrets you do not know about things to come.” After reading this, my internal monologue screams, “GREAT. I’d love to know some awesome secrets about the future.”
Context: So God has spent the last 30-something chapters telling the Israelites about how they’ve screwed up once again and once again he plans to discipline them. But (and it’s a major but as it speaks to God’s character) he always leaves the Israelites an out. All they have to do is turn to him, repent, and start following his commandment. He loves so much that despite the fact that they are betraying him by worshipping Baal (a god from another religion) and murdering people, he wants them to come back to him. Even when the Israelites are exiled to Babylon, God is still telling Jeremiah of his plans to bless his chosen ones. He plans to give them back their land, help them to prosper, to do good and not harm them. All they have to do is make good on their end of a centuries old deal.
I look at this, and I see this beautiful, merciful God who loves his people, the same people who just cannot get it together. Then I recognize that he did all the things he told Jeremiah he was going to do and then some by sending Jesus to us. It makes me feel like this passage is speaking to me, like God is whispering, “Just ask.”
And I do.
God tells me that something big is going to happen at Project Searchlight. And that’s it.
That was three weeks ago.
So I’ve spent the last couple of weeks waiting for God to clue me into some details. Those details haven’t come in yet and keep praying. As Mark Batterson says in 40 days of prayer, my prayers are ALAT—as long as it takes, not ASAP—as soon as possible.
BUT THAT’S REALLY HARD.
The last week I’ve spent in a limbo of not knowing what’s to come. It’s a dance that balances choosing my thoughts and choosing to trust the Lord on one hand and crippling doubt and second-guesses on the other hand. And it’s hard.
So what does one do while they are waiting on the Lord? They untie balloons using a bobby pin and teammate that has more patience than you do. They serve the way they are called to. They love they way they are called to. They worship the way they are called to.
This song was recommended by my friend, Rebekah, and it’s really helping in this season. It’s called While I’m Waiting by John Waller. If you’re waiting for answer to prayer or anything else in your life, give it a listen. Maybe God will give you some of the supernatural peace he’s given me.
