What do you do when you’re pregnant on the World Race?
The Lord called me to the World Race. People would say “The Lord knew the World Race was 11 months long. Why would he call you to it if he didn’t want you to stay the whole 11 months?”
The thing is, God is God. His thoughts are not our thoughts; His ways are not our ways. He is beyond anything we could ever muster up.
If The Lord called me on the World Race to experience community and family like I never have before, if it was only to help me break down my walls, shed light on my sin and addictions, if it was just for me to learn to trust, if it was just to show me the love of the father – it was worth it.
What do you do when you’re pregnant on the World Race?
“All the thoughts and lies that consumed my mind; I could never tell anyone what I had gone through” – I thought as I sat in feedback, remembering every detail of what seemed like the longest few minutes of my life. I laid there helpless and defenseless, as he violated every part of me.
After what seemed like hours of my laying on the ground I got up went home and pretended like nothing happened. As I cried myself to sleep promising to never speak of it again. Ya know what I’m saying? I know those girls. Those girls weren’t me. When I tell my story it’s of the tough girl with a rough life. It’s about missing meals and couch surfing. It’s about feelings of abandonment. My story was never supposed to be about the girl who was raped. I knew those girls. Now I was those girls. And then I was pregnant with my Rapist’s baby.
Now everything that I had planned for my next 8 months were ruined. Because now I was going home.
But in fact it wasn’t ruined at all. The Lord simply just had other plans. One that was better. My time on the race was complete. It was time to come home.
Being back in the States I was so confused. I couldn’t figure out what was I to do here. In the meantime, I was trying to prepare myself for the new season in my life. I’m gonna be a mother. Although I was not very excited about it. I knew that The Lord would help me in this season but I had questions.
One day I had been experiencing menstrual cramps and light bleeding. I didn’t think It was normal, but I didn’t think too much about it. The next day I woke up and I was having a miscarriage. I was heart broken. But mostly just inside. Wasn’t sure how to express it outside. As soon as I left the hospital I went to see a counselor that I know. She wasn’t there, so I took it as a “get out of church free card.” I wasn’t consistent in my church going or reaching out and being in relationship with believers. I have since gotten back on track. It started with just as simple as consistency in my daily communication with the savior. I sought him out because it seemed like I had nothing else. As I sought after Him, the more I started to realize that no matter how upset I get at Him, no matter how badly I reject Him, He loves me and is waiting for me to turn right back around.
As I’m drawing more near to Him, He is bringing me back to where I started, putting on my heart a place that is very near to it: Honduras.
The Lord kept giving me dreams and faces of the beautiful people I had the honor of meeting. More specifically, girls who He has called me to be like a mother to. The Lord has been preparing the mother in me.
Recently, I was asked to come back to Honduras. I was asked to come back on a one month commitment.
Going back to Honduras and being a part of the family at Zion’s Gate is something I consider a privilege. I know The Lord is calling me back to those girls. For my month commitment my focus will be to continue daily growth with the Father, to get to know each person of the family on a deeper level. The Lord has blessed me with the gift of cooking really yummy things. I will get to share this gift! I will cook lunch for the family every Monday-Friday. I will also assist my Honduran mother with dinners. Getting to pour life into her, using the gift of cooking The Lord has giving me.
I’m sure there are many other things The Lord has in store for me in the month of January and that is why I need your help. Leaving Zion’s Gate back in September was just as hard as leaving the World Race, but it all had a purpose. The Lord has loved me – by giving me the opportunity to go on the World Race, by allowing me to identify with the orphans and lost children in these third world countries, by allowing me to experience a miscarriage, and now, by giving me the opportunity to return to Zion’s Gate as a stronger daughter of God and a disciple to His word.
The Lord has loved me. All the Lord wants is disciples that think as He does, love as He does, see as He does, teach as He does, and serve as He does. And that is how I want to impact this world, in honor of the daughter I once carried inside of me. I am ready to be a mom to all the children at Zion’s Gate.
What do you do when you’re pregnant on the World Race? You allow The Lord to help you grow into the mother He is calling you to be.
My calling is to return to Honduras but I need your help to make this possible. Although I have my plane ticket there covered, I need donors to support my missionary work. My invitation is to first visit Zion’s Gate for a month and then plan for a life as an independent missionary in Honduras – I need support for food, transportation around the country, Return plane ticket and other miscellaneous expense I can encounter while serving God’s kingdom. The amount needed to raise is $2,000 Below is my PayPal information and my email address if you feel called to help me serve the lost sons and daughters of Zion’s Gate, and others in the Nation of Honduras.
PayPal email: [email protected]
Contact Email: mikkiagentrygmail.com
Proverbs 3:5-6:
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall make your paths straight.”
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