Since coming on the race, I’ve tried about everything. There are some opportunities to say no, but most of the time you say yes and get through it. Doing things that are outside of your comfort zone grow the space that you give the Lord to move.
There have been some hilarious moments and times that I felt like I was on the top of the world, but there has also been struggling moments. Not having wifi when all you want is to talk to someone who knows you is hard. Eating eggs every single day for breakfast gets old. Drinking water that tastes funny is questionable, but you just go with it. Sometimes you prolong showers because you just feel dirty after it, and other times you don’t wash your hair for a week and a half.
The race is also hard. Doing a ministry you feel useless at isn’t always the more fun thing. Living in community with random people is super challenging some days and there are times you just feel like freaking out for no reason. Seeing kids not eating because they can’t afford it or muslim refugees expressing how scared they are to maybe get relocated to the US is difficult. Walking past bars where women are selling their body like it is an object and seeing men with lust in their eyes kills me every time. It absolutely sucks at the end of every month when you say goodbye to the people you’ve loved and relied on for a month. It sucks when they ask you when you’ll be back or if you could stay forever. It sucks when kids come up and ask you to sponsor them so they can continue going to school, but you can’t.
The race has completely opened my eyes and broken my heart. It’s hard to see these things go on and know that God’s heart is breaking even more than mine is. I’ve realized how much I’ve grown, but I’ve also allowed God to grow me. I’ve put myself out there and failed at preaching a few times, but you trust that God moved the way he wanted to. The race has been absolutely amazing and I know the rest of it will be too.
Some days are easier than others. Yeah we go to 11 different countries and see the world and it’s awesome, but the same God at home in the US is the same God in all of these countries. If you give God a little bit, He will take a lot and completely transform your life. It’s a beautiful thing ya know, to be used by the Lord who created this entire world.
You can step out of your comfort zone. You can share the gospel. You can pray for healing and show others love. God gifted you will all of these things and he expects you to use them. too.
