(journal exerpt)
"So sweet times on the train to Budapest. A drunk guy on the train kept stopping by our girls sitting to my left, and talking with them. As first I was just watching, waiting to see if he would cross any lines so I would be ready if I needed to take action. God showed me, that I needed to stop focusing on trying to control the situation, and start listening for what HE wanted to do through the situation. I could have easily made an enemy out of him, God had me make a friend out of him. He sat down with the girls, and I joined the conversation, sharing parts of my testimony and leading him to a better understanding of who Christ is. Anyways, what we really needed for this guy was a word from God, because we could sit and talk about God for hours, but a word from God could go past all the walls and sober him up to the reality of Christ's love for him. So he left for a bit, and we all started praying. All of us felt that his father had failed to love him, failed to approve of him, and that was the root of a lot in his life, and the root of his crooked view of who God is. God started to speak more to me, and this is what I wrote:
A story.
This is a story about a man. This man wasn't treated well by his father. He didn't receive love from his father, and though he often looked to his father for approval, he never received it. Most of the time the only thing he received was abuse. Because his father didn't love him, he didn't feel worthy of receiving love. Because his father didn't approve of him, he thought no one else would approve of him. Feeling unworthy to receive love, and thinking no one would ever approve of the life he would lead, he settled for just finding ways to escape the cruel 'reality' his failed father created for him. He settled for just living a life of temporary satisfaction.
Father God knew this man's story, and it broke God's heart. God wanted this man to know that God as a Father NEVER lets His sons down. God wanted this man to know that He loves him, regardless of anything he could do. God wanted this man to know, that His Father in heaven approves of him. His Father in heaven says he is worthy of love, and worthy of life. His Father in heaven says He has a good and perfect and pleasing will for the man's life, plans to prosper him and not to harm him, plans to give him hope and a future. His heavenly Father was so sad that he was settling for a life less than the amazing life God had in store for him.
God loved him and approved of him so much, that God sent a messenger to hm one night, to proclaim the wonderful message that would bring him true and complete freedom. God sent the messenger, but it is up to the man to choose to receive it.
After I got this word from God, I waited for an opportunity to give it to him. He came back and talked for awhile, and then invited me to have a cigarette in between the train cars. I told him I wouldn't smoke, but would love to join him. I talked a bit, and then gave him the word. He was pretty drunk at this point, and struggled to read it, but he read the whole letter word by word. I watched as it penetrated his heart. He told me his father had let him down, and hurt him in many ways. While the word spoke to him, he then asked me how I could believe in the "air", suggesting I was believing in something that didn't exist. I told him that when I first became a Christian, it was just by believing, but Christianity is not a blind faith. Everyday I experience God in my life. He speaks to me, I feel His Spirit move, He has healed me, He shows me the way to go.
Later he (his name is Stian) came back to our train car with a friend. They sat down with our girls, and while they didn't object, I could tell they didn't want to be bothered by these guys. I tried to steal their attention, and saw that his friend wasn't nearly as drunk as he was. Whats funny, is Stian actually brought his friend Anthon over to talk with me, telling me he would be more receptive! I convinced them to go with me to the restaraunt cart, so the girls wouldn't be bothered and so we could have a more private conversation.
We talked for a few hours. They smoked the entire time. It was pretty late (perhaps 2am), and I wasn't exactly thrilled to be in the tiny smoke filled restaraunt car, when I could be sleeping back in my car. Still, I wanted to be obedient to what God was calling me to, trusting He would give me the rest I needed and protect my lungs, haha. At this point Stian was extremely drunk and was becoming hostile to the conversation, but he left for awhile. I talked with Anthon and he was very receptive. Actually, while we talked he said he felt something, he felt really warm, and it felt really good. I told him it was the Holy Spirit. I shared the gospel and all sorts of testimonies and answered any questions he had. It was getting late and Stian came back, and so I asked if I could pray for him before I left. After I prayed for Stian, Anthon sat down right next to me and asked me to pray for him! I didn't even suggest it, he just really wanted prayer! It was sweet. I layed hands on him and started to pray for him, and then started to prophesy over his life, and he stopped me and told me he felt something really strong over him, and that it felt really good. I knew my prayers that Jesus would encounter him were being answered! Sooo awesome. He asked how he could receive Christ, and I told him through repentance and surrendering his life to Christ. He said he didn't want to then, but that he would pray with God later. Soo cool!
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