All the way to Africa I prayed, pleaded and begged God to show Himself to me in a new way. I needed to experience Him to know He cared, He is good and He still loves. I didn’t want to be in Africa, I wanted my travel day to end in India. But something deep inside of me told me that God was waiting on me in Africa. My heart was not in Africa, my heart wasn’t with my team, and it definitely wasn’t with ministry. The last thing I wanted to do was love on more kids just to experience more hurt and sin from the world.
The second night we were here I had a dream that I was on life support (spiritually) and there was an endless line of “things” waiting to pull the plug. I searched for God but couldn’t find Him anywhere in the room. I woke up feeling defeated and went throughout my day in a somber mood, ready to attend a funeral. Abby came into the bedroom and told me she had been praying specifically for me that morning. She shared some of the things God told her and then she prayed with me. That afternoon while, standing in a field in the middle of the mountains of Kenya surrounded by beautiful Africa children playing soccer and braiding American hair, I heard God speak. “My Daughter, nothing can pull the plug on you. I am your life support. You are mine.” I found Abby as fast as I could and shared with her what had happened in the field. She ran and got her journal and shared more of what she had specifically prayed. She prayed that my eyes would be open when God used His African children to show me His love and His goodness.
I AM HIS!! Nothing can take me away from Him. I still have questions for God and I am still learning to trust Him, especially when I don’t understand. But, I am here to say that I did NOT die in Asia!!!
“BUT as a result, we stopped relying on ourselves and learned to rely only on God, who raises the dead.” (the last part of 2 Corinthians 1:9 that I didn’t focus on)
