Hmm… how to even begin describing the craziest (thus far) ten days of my life?!
When I boarded my plane from Lexington, KY to Atlanta, GA on Saturday, July 25th, I had absolutely no idea what I was getting myself into.
Prior to that day, I felt nothing but peace and excitement about what was ahead. I was confident that I was going exactly where the Lord was calling me, and I was proud of myself for doing this; proud of myself for obeying a scary call to abandon my life for 9 months. Ten days ago I didn’t realize that’s what was really going on in my heart. Yes, I wanted to do this World Race to glorify the Lord, expand His Kingdom, and grow myself, but as the time grew closer and closer, (just being honest here) I think I became prideful in the fact that I was doing this. HA. I was in for a wake up call!
After arriving at the training camp in Gainesville, GA it didn’t take long for me to realize that I was way out of my comfort zone. And I mean I was out of my comfort zone physically, emotionally, spiritually… more than I ever had been before. But God was preparing to wreck me that week, in the best way possible!
Physically, we ate some crazy, ethnic, not-filling food, and got way too little sleep! One night we slept in a room set up like an airport… as in, bright lights all night, and a constant recording of planes taking off, flights being announced, and people chattering! It was a weird night’s sleep to say the least!
Emotionally, I was having a really hard time surrendering my discomfort to the Lord. I began feeling a lot of anxiety about connecting with my squad-mates, and was feeling really worried about who I was going to be placed on a team with. All of this worrying tied in with my spiritual experience as well. My constant anxiety and failure to surrender the situation to the Lord put up a wall between Him and me. I wasn’t fully relying on Him like I thought I would. I could not let go of personal struggles and doubts. Throughout the week as I was pursuing the Lord and searching for a reason why I wasn’t connecting with Him the way I usually do, He gave me this word from Philippians.
“Don’t worry about anything, instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need and thank Him for all He has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard our hearts and minds as we live in Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 4:6-7
When I came across this verse it spoke to me directly, and I finally realized that my worry was hindering me from experiencing God’s peace. And even when I was feeling so out of my comfort zone that I didn’t even understand how I was experiencing peace, the Lord provided me with that perfect overwhelming peace. So that was a verse that I lived by the rest of the week, and it truly got me through. Once I came to that realization and place of surrender, my whole week completely flipped around. Yeah, it was still hard, and I was still uncomfortable sometimes, but I was ok with it. It was almost relieving to accept that I can’t do this on my own. The thing is, I’m not even supposed to do this on my own!!!
My squad is such a blessing! Every single person has such a huge heart for the Lord, and is genuinely interested in everyone else. I experienced the Lord’s love and saw His heart through so many sweet conversations with individuals. As I mentioned, I was really nervous about team assignments. This is the smaller group of people that I will specifically be doing ministry with, for at least the first 3 months of the race. God is so sweet, he knew how worried I was, but he just gave me a little nudge saying, “hey, seriously, I got this!” and oh how silly I was for not believing it! I am on a team with 6 incredible ladies that I absolutely can’t wait to take this journey with!
Although the week began filled with discomfort, doubt, and pride, it ended filled with excitement, full and complete trust, and humility. A different person boarded the plane to Lexington on August 4, 2015, than the one who left 10 days before. I was stretched spiritually, emotionally, and physically in ways that are so valuable and vital to my faith and the rest of my life. I wouldn’t change the past 10 days for any bit of physical comfort, and I can only imagine what 9 MONTHS of this will do to me!! I can’t wait! My Father is good, and He is love, and He is relentless in His pursuit of me!
Thanks for keeping up with my journey,
Megan
