Community is rough. It shows me just how sinful I am.
This month I am in the Philippines. It is one of the most beautiful places I have ever seen; it’s absolutely breathtaking. We are serving in San Mateo (the bigger island), working with a ministry called, “Go Philippines.” We are here with another team- so it is myself and my new team and another newly formed team working together.
Our ministry this month is a lot of chores- such as farm duty (watering plants, feeding bunnies and cleaning their cages, feeding chickens and cleaning their pin, and feeding pigs and cleaning their pins also), kitchen duty (helping prepare meals, cleaning the kitchen, and washing dishes), property duty (sweeping, cleaning, washing walls, cleaning bathrooms, mopping, leaf blowing, raking, burning, and such), prepping and painting a soon-to-be grocery store and barber shop, staining a bamboo seating area outside a super cool snack shack, working the snack shack, helping serve during a Vacation Bible School, helping serve at both a boys and a girls camp for street kids, and such. 🙂 It’s been a ton of fun! It’s been really neat being able to serve in so many different types of ministry so far this month.
I have been reading through Hosea. Wow. I don’t even know where to begin to describe to you the things Jesus has been showing me! It’s incredible. If you’ve never read it; go do it! 🙂 Hosea is about a man whom God asked to marry a woman who would not remain faithful to him. He was asked to marry this woman and even when she was unfaithful, to remain faithful to her. IT IS SUCH A PICTURE OF OUR JESUS AND HIS SWEET PURSUIT AND UNFATHOMABLE LOVE FOR US. This husband serves his wife so beautifully. He is sweet to her, he pursues her heart, he is faithful at every point. She, however, desires other things. She marries him then seeks other things above him. She pursues these things and doesn’t serve her husband as a wife should at all. She is an adulterous wife and what does he do…He loves her even more. When she is set up on a stage- as being redeemed FROM SLAVERY…HE PURCHASES HER. He buys her to be HIS. Even after all she has done; she is an adulteress beyond measure; He still buys her in his love. He purchases her because not only does he call her ENOUGH- but he shows her that SHE IS ENOUGH. He not only speaks that she is “worthy,” but he proves to her in his love and pursuit and faithfulness that to him…she is worthy and she is worth it.
Do you see this? In chapter two- one of my very favorite parts- He says, “Therefore, behold, I will allure her, and bring her into the wilderness, and speak tenderly to her. And there I will give her her vineyards and make the Valley of Achor a door of hope…And in that day, declares the Lord, you will call me ‘My Husband,’ and no longer will you call me ‘My Baal’…I will make you lie down in safety. And I will betroth you to me forever. I will betroth you to me in righteousness and in justice, in steadfast love and in mercy. I will betroth you to me in faithfulness. And you shall know the Lord.” {2:14-20}
The Lord takes the picture of this marriage and alludes it to His relationship to Israel, to His people- to us. This month, community- the struggle of community within two teams- twelve girls- has been challenging at times- honestly. It has definitely revealed my sinfulness within frustration, within negative thoughts and conversations, and so on. Along with that, this month Jesus has also brought up things in my heart that have been difficult to deal with and lay down. Some of those things that you must lay down and then lay down and then lay down again. Man y’all, I’m a mess. And Jesus sees all that and says, “I will allure you into the wilderness. I will speak tenderly to you. I will give you a door of hope. You- MY BRIDE- can call me Husband because that’s who I am, the Bridegroom. I will make you lie down in safety. I will betroth you to me FOREVER and in such marvelous and beautiful things that you so deeply desire. I see the sin- I am bringing it up to you so we can get rid of it- so I see it- but I pursue you still.”
In Hosea, Gomer, the wife, just keeps doing more and more wrong. She keeps getting deeper and deeper into this adultery and it seems as if Hosea pursues her even more. Not by any means does this give Gomer or even ourselves more reason to sin or any bit of excuse to desire things above God- not by any means- but it just shows how WORTH IT we are to Him- how DEEPLY in love with us that He is, and how He continually over and over shows us that we are ENOUGH.
Often times this month we have made little jokes about Cinderella. While wiping down walls, wiping up the floors, cleaning off chairs…it gets easy for chores to become mundane and just work. One day, while wiping the walls, having these thoughts along with thoughts of frustration because “others weren’t working nearly as hard” (told you- so sinful; such a mess) Jesus so graciously and gently spoke to my heart- “Who are you working for here? Am I not worthy enough? I am teaching you how to be a bride, THE Bride.”
You see- it all goes hand in hand. A bride serves her husband. She is faithful to him. She sometimes wipes walls, sometimes does dishes, she keeps the house clean, she cooks, and sometimes she even feeds the pigs- she works and serves with all she’s got, the best she can because she is faithful to him, because she loves him and because she serves in the overflow of this love. (Ephesians 5). Not only is Jesus preparing me and teaching me how to be a bride on this earth one day (hopefully; Lord willing :)) by learning to cook, learning to be diligent in chores, learning how to love on and care for these street kids, learning how to do these different needed tasks, along with the deeper things too- but He is also teaching me how to be His Bride. He is my LOVER. He loves me very best. He knows how to love me more than anyone ever does or ever will…and He does it. He so sweetly and so beautifully pursues my heart with His beautiful creation- in the mountains, in the flowers He sprinkles on my Bible as I am reading in the mornings, through people affirming and encouraging me with words I need at the very moment they speak. He speaks to me through sweet Filipino people telling me that I am beautiful over and over. He pursues me with amazing Filipino waterfalls and sweet old ladies. He pursues my heart with the most beautiful sunrises and sunsets- no one else can ever pursue my heart with things such as these! 🙂 He knows my heart. He sees my sin. He hears my ugly thoughts. He knows that I often times desire things above Him. He knows that I am so often an adulterous wife. And even still…He not only calls me ENOUGH…He not only calls me WORTHY and tells me that I AM WORTH IT………BUT HE PROVES IT IN HIS LOVE. He pursues even more. He is jealous for me and my heart. He sees the slavery I get myself into and HE PURCHASES ME OFF THE STAND- OUT OF THAT BONDAGE. HE PURCHASES ME FOR HIS OWN. He is the best and most persistent and diligent pursuer. He DOESN’T GIVE UP! HE’S NOT GOING ANYWHERE! 🙂
That is who I am. & that is just how loved we are.
“In that day you will call me My Husband; you will no longer call me My Master.”
Hosea 2:16
“And I will betroth you to me forever…”
Hosea 2:19
“Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish…Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.”
Ephesians 5:22-32
