Romania, month 4.
I am sitting in my bed reading about a woman in Mozambique who has devoted her life to orphans and the Kingdom of God (Compelled by LOVE by Heidi Baker). I am covered by two big comforters, hot tea on my left and a space heater on my right. I read of LOVE. I read about the Beatitudes. I read of God’s miracles, His power, and His love for children and the nations. I read of a woman caring for orphans, learning from them, living with them, and seeing the Kingdom in and thru them.
Then a soft whisper, “I’ve made you for orphans, for the lost and abandoned.”
“No, that can’t be Lord, I’m not all about kids.”
I turn the page and continue to read and press on…..
Another whisper, this time a bit louder, “You will have an orphanage.”
“What? That’s not me. I don’t have enough love for that! And that is WAY too big for me, you can’t possibly ask me to do that with my life. I can’t love that many children/kids. I’m leaving for Africa in a week, there I will speak, evangelize, and truly figure out what I’m supposed to be and do with my life.”
“Love, Megan. That is all I’m asking you to do.”
I take a deep breath and pray and ask the Lord to change his mind.
“I will love. But an orphanage isn’t what I expected for my life Lord. Are you really asking me to do this? Why do I have to sacrifice? What about what I want?………Have your way. Your way is better than mine. BUT, you are going to have to change my heart. Increase my desire for this, change my heart, change me. I want what you have for me, I trust you. I hesitate, but I trust you.”
I turn up the space heater as I lay in bed overwhelmed by what the Lord is asking of me. No way can I do this on my own. No way can I do this in my own strength. No way can I do this, I don’t want it. So I ignore it. I try to let it pass but it keeps coming up. It keeps stirring in my heart. I think back to a few prophetic visions I received before the race. So I share it with my team and ask them to pray for me in this.
Then the entire squad meets up together to leave for Africa! I set it on the shelf and look forward to all the promises God has in Africa! I love that continent! It’s going to be so good! I’m going to speak, preach, bring the Word, and see God move in miraculous ways! (Expectations what?)
Then….a fast swoop and bam, I’m on my back.
Two broken legs….
(Stay tuned for Part 2 & 3 next week…)
