I want to put this into a blog where I talk about how it has affected my family, what has come of it already, the things we can see coming up, and what it was like facing what was probably the hardest day of my life yesterday, but I just can’t get it started. So it will just be straight facts at this point:
Leia is blind in one eye. There is no blood flow going to it, and no vision. Her other eye has only a spot of vision, and from what I understand she can’t see color. Something to do with the retina not functioning, and some of the eye still working. Doctors say sometimes that heals, sometimes it doesn’t, we’ll just have to wait. Tuesday is when my parents will meet with the social workers and whoever else they need to to talk about bringing her home, what kind of care she’ll need, extra help, those kinds of things.
For those that don’t know Leia, and since I think I’ve failed to mention it here, this is that much harder for all of us because Leia is one of the most naturally talented photographers I’ve ever come across. She loves visual arts, is very good at it, and for the last few years it has seemed that this is the direction her life would go in. Leia is being stronger than any of us at this point, as her reaction to the doctor’s report was that she could still see enough to take pictures. I got to talk to her for the first time, and I witnessed a miracle, as Skype connection + cell phone inside a hospital + 6000km + Leia’s broken jaw SHOULD equal no communication, but we did pretty good. She has a garden going in her hospital room, including her favourite flower: sunflowers. She’s had non-stop visitors, is laughing lots it seems, and has been demanding more walks from the physiotherapists than they are offering. So all in all, she’s in good spirits.
As for me, well, I hate being this far away. It sucks. And all day yesterday, no matter how much I wanted to be able to pray and/or worship God, to turn things over to Him, about all I managed was sitting there and telling him just that: this sucks. I couldn’t get any further. I was so drained in every way that all I could do was keep from crashing at any given moment. Getting the news about Leia’s eyes made yesterday the hardest day I can remember facing, ever.
But I have family here. When I couldn’t muster up the ability to approach God in worship, they took me there, and it was amazing. When I didn’t want to talk through it, they asked the gentle questions that got me out of my self inflicted solitude. And when I was scared they’d just offer advice, words, or prayers made to sound like everything was rosy, they offered to share in the ‘this sucks’ feelings instead. And then prayed through their own tears with me.
