I, Malorie Joy Finley, the girl on an 11 month missions trip, am turning away from Christianity. And if I can be more honest than that, I hope that after reading this blog some of you will join me.
I can still remember being 3 or 4 years old sitting in my Sunday school class learning about some guy named Moses. All I really remembered about the dude as I walked out of that class was that he witnessed a bush catch on fire out of nowhere and made a list of 10 rules that we are all supposed to follow if we want to be a good Christian.
As I continued to grow up in the church I was taught even more rules. I was told by my peers and a youth leader that my outgoing and adventurous spirit wasn’t of God. If I wanted to be a good Christian I needed to be more quiet and join a bible study or two. I was told that all sins are equal in the eyes of God, but I was rejected for the things that I stumbled in. That’s when I decided that maybe this whole uptight, fun sucking Christianity thing wasn’t for me.
Don’t get me wrong, church is great. I love having a community of fellow believers to go through all the things with. The part that throws me off is when we start condemning that same community for their human errors and get caught up in giving more preference to following a list of rules rather than being concerned with the relationship and well being of our brother or sister in Christ.
The New Testament gives 2 rules to follow above all others- love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind and to secondly love your neighbor as yourself.
That’s it. There are no personality requirements listed, no amount of bible studies you have to attend or number of Hail Mary’s that need to be prayed to get you on Jesus’ good side. We just have to love.
So instead of being known as a Christian, I want my identity to be as a disciple. I don’t ever want my relationship with God to feel like a chore. I want to be the kind of person who is too busy loving others that I don’t have time to follow a list of man-made rules on how to be a good Christian in the eyes of the church. I want to share the love of God with people right where they’re at. I want them to know the things that I believe for sure; that those 10 commandments from Moses are important and that even though we’re given grace it’s not a free pass to freely walk in sin. But I also want them to know that it’s okay to not have it all together. Jesus sees you and loves you in your filth and he wants to walk with you through it. None of us are perfect, but by the grace of God we can all be saved from our imperfections.
The people that I have been blessed with the opportunity to serve here in Nepal often times have many gods before the one true God. It’s hard for me to admit, but at first I found myself looking down on them for bowing before an empty statue. It wasn’t until I went on a long hike to a temple that God revealed to me all of the idols that I had in my own life; things that I put before my relationship with him. That conviction is something that I’m working through and am so thankful to have a God that loves me through that mess.
Christians tend to get a bad rep for being ‘too good’ to hang out with people who don’t follow the same set of rules or go to church on Sunday’s. Imagine instead having a reputation for loving people so outrageously right where they’re at. That’s what Jesus did, after all. Not just with the woman at the well, but with each and every one of us. Who are we to say that our fellow brother or sister isn’t worthy of such love and grace when we are continually extended it by the king of kings day after day?
I don’t want to be a member of the ‘rules before relationships’ church of Christianity. Instead, I want people to know that I am a Christian; Christ-follower or disciple; because of the way I freely love.
UPDATE:
Our squad is staying in a ministry house this month! Please pray for unity as we have the opportunity to work together all of August. Also, please pray for muscle spasms and rib pain that I have been having. Thank you all for your support!
