As most of you know, I am graduating from Thomas Edison State University in May. I can’t believe that this amazing chapter of my life is ending. I can remember thinking about college when I was a kid. It seemed so grown-up and distant then, which makes it feel even crazier that I will soon be a college graduate.
Now comes the crazy part. As you might have guessed by the fact that this is a World Race blog, I am going on the World Race Gap Year! I leave at the beginning of August and will spend three months in Guatemala, three in Lesotho, and three in Cambodia.
Now, you might be asking, “What brought this up? Why did you decide to do this? Why on earth would you want to be in strange countries without your family for nine months? ”. Those are great questions! Grab a seat (and possibly a nice cup of tea) because it’s story time!
It all started about four years ago. I was sixteen, and finishing up high school. My mom and I had just gotten off the phone with CollegePlus, where I had just enrolled.
“You know, Mallory” my mom said, “You could graduate by the time you’re twenty! All of your friends will still be in school for two more years. What are you going to do with those extra years? You could stay in school, get a job, or do something like a year long mission trip.”
For one reason or another, the mission trip idea stuck with me. Initially, I was afraid.I thought maybe just a month or two would be a good idea. However, as the months went by, the idea of an extended mission trip stayed on my mind. I had this feeling in my stomach whenever I thought about it. It was not only fear, but also a feeling that I needed to do it anyway, despite how afraid I was. I stayed that way for about a year: half fear and half conviction.
Finally, I told my mom that I was seriously interested in a year long mission trip. I started to look at different programs, which felt overwhelming. There were endless possibilities of, not only different organizations to go with, but different locations as well. Around this time, I had two different people tell me about the World Race. I initially didn’t like the idea of going to different countries and didn’t think much about it. A little bit later, I looked at their website just out of curiosity. That’s when I found the Gap Year trip.
Three countries in nine months was the perfect middle between staying in one place the whole year and the World Race 11 in 11 trip. I had a moment where everything seemed so clear, and I knew this was what I wanted to do.
I still had to wait though. I had to wait, and do school, and wait, and work, and wait, and wait some more. I decided I wanted to finish college before I went on the trip, so my excitement for the mission trip really helped keep me motivated.
Finally, last August, the routes came out for the trip I wanted to go on. I had waited for that moment for almost two years. I finally got to decide what countries I would go to, and be able to turn in my application.
As you know, I choose the Guatemala, Lesotho, and Cambodia trip. Everything is happening so fast now. I graduate at the end of May, go to training camp in June, and leave on my adventure in August!
I still am terrified. I worry that I’ll miss my family too much. I cry when I remember that I will miss Sophie’s thirteenth birthday. I worry that I am going on this trip for the wrong reasons. What if I’m just trying to prove my independence, or make a statement? I worry that something might happen to me or someone I love back at home. I worry that the trip won’t be everything I hoped it would after all this waiting. I worry that the people I love at home will figure out how to live without me. I worry about being a failure.
However, despite all of these fears, I am going to do it. I am going away from home for nine months. I am going to show people across the world the love of Christ. I am going to miss my family so much, I am going to cry, and I am going to fail and fall on my face many times. But that’s ok.
I trust that God is big enough to dry my tears, be enough for me, and make something beautiful out of my failures. I am confident in the knowledge that if I step out of my comfort zone, he will be able to use me to do amazing things. His plan is so much bigger than I am. I am constantly overwhelmed by all he has done for me so far, and I can’t wait to see what he has in store for this next year. Psalm 46 has been on my heart for the last few months.
“God is our refuge and strength,
A very present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear,
Even though the earth be removed,
And though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea;
Though its waters roar and be troubled,
Though the mountains shake with swelling.” (Psalm 46:1-3)
I firmly believe in God’s glory and power. So I know that as long as I do my best, he is great enough and good enough to make up the deficit.
At the end of the day, my purpose is to live my life in such a way that gives glory to God. I can think of no better way to do that than to spend nine months loving his children around the world.
So that is where I’m at! I am so excited to start this adventure, and I plan to keep you all updated along the way. You can subscribe to my blog by clicking on the “Follow Me” tab on the left. Over these next few months, please pray for me as I prepare to leave. Your encouragement will make all the difference! Thank you so much for taking the time to read this post! If you have any questions at all, feel free to contact me at any time!
