A couple Wednesday’s ago I woke up in immense pain all over my body. I remember thinking maybe I could just sleep it off. I was in tears and told my teammates I was going to stay back from ministry, in which they replied that they were taking me to the hospital. I was in so much pain and wanted to be alone in my pain, but they insisted on taking me. When we got to the hospita, I realized that the pain I was experiencing was more than what I thought. Within the next couple of hours and a few tests, I was admitted to the hospital with dengue fever.
I would go back and forth between high temperatures and my fever breaking. When the fever seized my body, I would become aware of every bone, muscle, and joint in my body. As every fiber of my being was aching, I would cry and sob. I was humiliated but at the same time I didn’t care.
I saw Jesus so tangibly through the way my team loved me.
They combed tangles out of my hair,
They rubbed my back and played with my hair.
They wiped my constant tears away.
They put cold rags on my hot head.
They asked the doctors a million and one questions when I didn’t have the energy to speak.
They forced me to eat soup and drink juice.
They ran out the newspaper man and cleaning people from my room when I was resting (why they insist on starting at 4am I’ll never know)
They all volunteered to help with donating for a blood transfusion if necessary
They held my IV fluids as I heaved into the toilet.
They cranked my bed up and down many times each day to make sure I was comfortable.
They held me
They prayed over me constantly.
They kept me company when all I wanted was to be home with my mom.
I wanted to wallow in self pity, but instead they fought for me.
I wanted to be alone in my pain, but they wouldn’t allow it.
They saw me at my worst, and they walked with me through it.
My team. My Ethereal Flames. My baguettes. My girls. We survived dengue fever together. Even when they were tired after having a day of ministry, they would still walk a few miles to the hospital to be with me.
Not only did I have my team to help me, I literally had hundreds of people praying for me. When I saw all the posts and shares on Facebook, I was brought to tears at the amount of love and support I have back home, and even all over the world. I believe that through all of these prayers, the Lord healed me quicker and kept me from having to receive a blood transfusion. I saw Jesus through all the love and support from my friends and family, as you all saturated my team and I in prayers
Community is so beautiful. I apologize if you are tired of reading my blogs and hearing me talk about how much I love community. But I can’t help it. I will always fight for community because it looks like Jesus. It’s the fathers heart. Maybe I’m still in the ‘honey moon stage’ of this whole journey, or maybe I realize how deep the Lord’s love is for us in that he designed us to be like him.. He designed us to be relational people and even said it was not good for us to be alone. He has designed us for community in every messy beautiful way. To walk and love each other through our stories and lives, and dengue fever, encouraging and growing each other in intimacy not only with each other but also with the Lord.
So thank you! Thank you for praying for me and having others pray for me! Thank you for being my community. Thank you for looking like Jesus and reflecting the Father’s heart. How blessed I am to be surrounded by such a great community everywhere I go. I’m sending you all love!
**having dengue was a huge breaking point for me spiritually and walk with the Lord. Be watching for a blog coming soon about what God showed me.**
