It’s month three, my last month in Africa. My team and I are living in a house alone. As I type this, I can see them all laying on their mattresses writing, reading and (in one case) watching “The Proposal”. All seven of us sleep in the living room of the house, with our mattresses lined up along the walls, side by side. It’s like a month long slumber party. Our house is nice. Every African house we’ve stayed in has been. We’ve been incredibly blessed. So blessed in fact, that this is our first month to have to use a squatty. A squatty, for those who don’t know, is a hole in the ground with a porcelain or cement face (ours is cement..I have pictures no worries). It doesn’t flush and there is no sitting. You literally just squat over it. I won’t lie, I am not great at them in general. Pee almost always ends up on my foot causing me to wash my shoes way more than usual. BUT, I’m getting the hang of it. The fact that we only had a squatty potty for a toilet this month was both daunting and exciting.. I knew it would be a way to stretch myself and get out of my comfort zone. Then we got to the house and I decided to check it out…I saw it and immediately, before even going inside, realized why it might be a problem for me. So I braced myself and walked in, my eyes searching.. Instantly, my worst fears became my reality.. Literally dozens of spiders hanging in every corner, both high and low. I made it maybe thirty seconds before I started crying and ran out. How embarrassing to tell my team I can’t pee or shower because of my spider phobia. I’ve killed and captured a multitude of bugs and lizards to save my teammates over the past few months, but you put a spider in the room and I am a goner.. Make it 30 and I am literally hyperventilating as I assume the fetal position on the floor (though not this particular floor because it’s covered in pee). It’s a serious problem. I’m happy to report, however, after three attempts I was finally able to go in and pee (and shower, no worries) without crying. ALSO, after hearing that I was afraid to go in it, our contact, Lincoln, went in and brushed all the spiders and webs down.. It was really nice of him, but I’m still a little weary of that room.
As for eating, for every meal, we eat at a nice restaurant right by the house. Some of the food has been unexpectedly spicy (at least compared to food in Uganda and Rwanda) but for the most part really good and they have some of the best bread I’ve ever eaten. To those of you concerned that I lost weight the last month, it’s going to come back by the end of this one NO WORRIES! The bread will see to that. Not only am I eating bread for every meal, I’m also drinking a strong cup of coffee almost every day… Which is crazy because before Ethiopia I had never even tasted coffee. See, coffee is kind of a big deal here. They grow it everywhere and even say this is where drinking it first started. As a cultural tradition they have coffee ceremonies everyday and sit to drink three strong coffees a day. They love it! Since I am here and that’s they thing to do, I decided to try it. I still don’t like coffee but I drink at least a little every time they have a ceremony. Mom, I know you are so proud!
My ministry this month is working with an organization that promotes the well being of young girls in bad situations, finds sponsorships for children and senior citizens and takes in abandoned babies. There is even a weekly feeding program for the sponsored children. We will be doing programs every day. I’ll let you know how those go later. I have to admit, the babies are my favorite part. Right now there are seven of them. There were 20 but some have been adopted and others have been placed in foster homes. On the first day I walked in, I met the eyes of the most beautiful baby I’ve ever seen and smiled at him. He instantly burst into loud sobs and tears and I knew I’d love him forever. His name is Cusal (don’t take that spelling too seriously.. I’m pretty sure it’s wrong). He doesn’t cry when he sees me anymore.. At least not usually. He is used to my white skin and weird hair. I’ve even gotten him to smile and laugh a few times while playing. He has the saddest eyes, but when he smiles and laughs, he lights up the room. He has been at the center for nine months and is a little over a year old. His legs are very weak and he can’t walk. He scoots on his butt to get everywhere. He is beautiful and moody and perfect. If I could adopt him today, I’d leave the race in a heartbeat to do it. But I’m not married, I have no job, and no means to support a baby currently. No agency in their right mind would let me take on the responsibility of motherhood. I know the idea is crazy. I know I can’t.. But I wish I could. My hope is that he finds a good family within a year who will love him and can afford to take him to physical therapy for his legs so he can learn to walk. The good news is, as of today, he has a foster family. He will go to live with them in a week or two. I cried when they told me and still cry if I think about it. I was always going to leave him, now he is the one leaving me. I like it better that way though, so I’m not abandoning him. I am sad to say goodbye but so happy for him and I pray his family is a good one who loves him and chooses to adopt him. He will be the hardest person to leave this month. Even when he is crying hysterically at the top of his lungs for twenty five minutes because he had to have his diaper changed or when I feel like I can’t do anything right with him because everything is making him cry… I still want to take him home with me. I want to cuddle him, make him laugh and teach him about life. I hope his foster parents feel the same way about him that I do.
Ethiopia is a pretty cool place to be honest. Between the coffee, culture and crazy calendar (it’s 2008 here), it’s probably one of the most fascinating places I have had the opportunity to visit. Then you add in the babies and the bread and I’m in heaven. I will say of Rwanda, Uganda and here, the people are much less excited to see us and so not as friendly. More adults beg for things than we experienced where we were in the other two countries, but I think it’s just where we are. Africa has been really good to us. We’ve had great hosts with amazing ministries. I’ve seen God at work in all three of them. I have felt His presence and seen His love in the faces of the people. I have zero idea what Asia will be like, but it sure has some big shoes to fill.
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Challenges and growths: I’m still growing in confidence of my relationship with Christ (and just confidence in general). I allow myself to believe that because others know more, their relationship is stronger and that’s just not true. My relationship with God is solid regardless of what someone else knows… I’ve just been learning a less amount of time than them. I learn something knew everyday and I have to remind myself that the knowledge comes with time. Had I been in church since diapers or gone to seminary I’d know a lot more too! I also get discouraged when other people display spiritual gifts that I don’t have. I know we were all given different gifts and mine won’t always look the same as someone else’s and that is okay, but my lack of confidence makes me forget that sometimes. My goal is to grow into a more confident, assertive woman. The amount of cliche in that sentence is embarrassing and cringe worthy but, there you have it.
Prayer requests: the babies are all sick, the bread makes us sluggish, we are doing our own ministry this month (making up our program as we go) so pray that it is super fruitful and that we all remember how important it is to pour our hearts into it. Also, as dumb as it sounds… Pray for lack of spiders. Ignorance is bliss and I’d like to be able to just pretend they aren’t here.
Favorite moment:
I have two!
First: On our second night in Addis (a large city in Ethiopia), five of the girls on my team went to eat dinner and got lost going back to our hotel. It was dark and honesty we were afraid. No one was answering the phone and we had no idea where to go. All of the sudden a man appeared and asked if we needed help. Usually I’d be apprehensive but I felt at ease about it. He walked with us and we discovered that he was a Christian who worked with American missionaries a lot. He got us to our street and told us goodnight. I couldn’t help but think what a God moment. Of all the people to show up, it was a Christian who spoke English and was familiar with missionaries. We were all so thankful and amazed.
Second: This one is much shorter but sweeter. It is the first time I made baby Cusal laugh. 🙂
