Scene: It is dark. The team is sitting on the floor. There is the ever present whirrr of fans.
The battle field: A tiled living space, the walls have giant holes for ventilation.
The Assailants: The valiant women of R1:16 vs. Ants with wings
*WHAP!*
A notebook comes down on an unidentified flying insect. It is an ant with wings. The wings are double the length of the insect and the whole thing is about the size of the first digit of my index finger. As the team sits through team time we are simultaneously in the midst of the rage of battle. There are corpses everywhere. It is dark and the smell of sweat permeates the air (even though this has nothing to do with the battle and everything to do with the fact that we are in South East Asia without A/C). As we write encouragements and challenges to each other on neon yellow paper, bugs land on us. We dutifully swat and brush them off.
If they venture close enough they are exterminated by a plastic bag, shoe, lotion tube or whatever weapon is available.
*AHHH!!*
Their assault is relentless despite our best defensive strategies. We have tried to keep them outside by turning the lights off inside and keeping the lights on outside. But they still find their way through the ventilation holes.
“AH!” *SLAP* “GET OFF ME! LKAJD;LF GROSS.” *SHUDDERS*”
It is now bed time and the battle wages on. I am closest to the door so I do my best to wedge towel under the door to keep the invaders outside. But they are crafty little buggers and keep on coming.
*WHAP! WHAP! WHAP!*
My sleeping bad is surrounded by the remnants of critters that have had the ill-fated buggy judgement to come within arms reach. My faithful lotion tube never misses. I have armored myself within my bug deterring sleeping bag liner but I still feel the wriggle of ants under my elbow and on my neck. Their mistake. Each in their turn they lie with their fallen, winged anthren.
After half an hour I can’t take it any more and in a moment of weakness I ask my team mates if we can scoot closer into the middle of the room so that I can have some relief from the onslaught. So we put our pads side by side by side and decide to turn off the light outside in the hopes that the bugs will search out light elsewhere.
With these two modifications to our battle strategy, I retire to my spelling pad. With my trusty lotion tube close by I shut my eyes and drift to sleep, weary from the night Battle of the Bugs.
Until next time,
Gig’em and God bless
– Maggie “the exterminator” Higginbotham
