Challenge Accepted

My mind and heart are at battle.  I love to serve.  Serve my brothers and sisters.  All for Jesus.  Doing His work makes my heart and soul happy.  So, why is my mind and heart conflicting?  My heart wants to pour out, all the time, 24/7/365 serving all of me.  But my mind is telling my heart to rest.  To rest in Him, to go ahead and find rest in Him.  For my Father to continually pour into and fill me up to serve, I must rest and be ready to receive.  I need to remember one thing first: the reason why I am here on this Earth and the reason why I am doing this work.
 
I think I have become more in love with the Father’s work than the Father.
 
I asked for a serving heart this past month and the Lord blessed me with the attitude to serve.  Only I didn’t use it wisely.  I poured ALL of it into the WORK, and none of that on HIM.  You can’t do the Father’s work without the Father.  I am reminded by a David Crowder Band song…
 
“He is jealous for me.  Love is like a hurricane and I am a tree, bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy. When all of the sudden I’m unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory and I realize just how beautiful you are and how great your affections are for me.”
 
My God is jealous!  He’s jealous of the stuff I put in front of him.  Work, school, family, friends, guys, television, etc.  He’s sick of getting the last 10 minutes before bed.  He wants the whole 1,440 minutes of my day. I have come to realize that I have always recognized that my Father is always with me, but I don’t think I acknowledged His presence as much as I should have.  It’s like going on a date to a party and when you get there, you ignore your date and hang out with your friends or other guys.  God is sick of me inviting him to go places and not acknowledging His presence.  He wants to be introduced to everybody I know!  He’s sick of being ignored.
 
My Heavenly Dad is pursuing me!  Me, Lynsey Dawson, is being PURSUED!  And it just happens to be by the King of all kings, my Heavenly Father!
 
During month 2 debrief, my team was invited in to meet with our squad leaders and coaches.  When asked about my past 2 months, I spoke about my desire to do the work and how comfortable I felt doing it.  About 10 minutes later of dissecting my answer, my brother and squad leader Robbie gave me a challenge.  To just sit with my Dad for 2 weeks and do absolutely nothing that involves work.  (aka ministry) because honestly, I need to work on my relationship with my Father.  This challenge has been long overdue.  I want to get off this superficial level and get DEEP with my Father. Because…
 
He’s my best friend.
He’s my provider.
He’s my protector.
He’s my supplier.
He’s my saving grace.
He’s my redemption.
He’s always there for me and will NEVER leave me.
 
So, for two weeks I am going to accept the challenge with dignity and humbleness.  It has been confirmed in my soul.  It was time for a desperate measure.  My best friend Jesus had to take me away from my chaotic life in the United States and bring me on the World Race for me to just sit with Him.
 
Talk to Him. 
LISTEN to him.
Get to know Him. 
He knows me, he has known me from the time I was in my mother’s womb…but do I REALLY know Him?  I want to hear Him.
I want Him to give me prophetic visions. 
I want Him to give me words to encourage my brothers and sisters I encounter. 
I just want to become inseparable with Him. 
He’s my life. 
My life is His, not mine. 
So, If He’s living inside of me and I’m living for Him, I better get to know Him and make sure I’m doing this right.  And when I fall, He’s right there with his saving grace net to swoop me back up to my feet.
 
Jesus, just you and me for 2 weeks.  I’m excited! Let’s do this!