Dynamics of Love

 Our squad leaders came recently and one of the encouraging aspects of their role is they are the ones that have been placed here to ask the hard questions. The squad leaders are the ones that come to refresh and renew us and in the midst of it all ask us questions that are intended to move us forward.

 “How is your team dynamic?” 

 this year has been difficult in terms of team radiance’s dynamic…the interesting thing is that we are all so different with various beneficial characteristics but i think at times we are just unsure how to fit those together to have an incredible dynamic. 

 As we sat there and started working towards trying to make thoughts into words, silence took us over. By the end of the night, I was still so distraught and question filled. I just wanted to pack it up and say goodbye. I have wanted to throw my hands up and be finished of this situation so many times.

 I left to get some air and hopefully find the peace that God talks about in His word. The peace that doesn’t make sense or the peace that comes from remembering that God is in control and that He cares for the birds so He will surely care for you. As I began walking hastily and trying to ask God to calm me down, He began to say immediately “Lyndsie, Love is Patient, Love is Kind…” I remember saying out loud, “God, I know, I just need a place to hang out with you for a moment. I need a safe, peaceful place…”

 I ended up finding a place and sitting down and finding myself overloaded and so uncertain…
I opened up my bible and went to 1 Corinthians 13 and read though love is patient, love is kind. I moved on from there and immediately read, Love never gives up, love never loses faith, love never loses hope….I smiled as God reminded me that I cannot pack it up and say goodbye. I cannot lose hope because His love does not give up, His love endures. 

 I am learning that I long not to tolerate people or encourage them out of obedience but rather to love with God’s love. I quickly understood how laborious it is to try and love those around me with my love. I also learned how insufficient my love is and how insufficient I am.

 I have no idea what that looks like to love others with God’s love and daily, I am having to ask God to provide that kind of love. I have to surrender any ideas I have and put down my pride as well as my arrogance and ask God to give me HIS love for my teammates but also for others around me…..for the rest of my life. I will spend the rest of my life surrendering and asking God to provide His love for those around me. 

 God then led me to the book of James…

 first line : Faith and Endurance
“Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an
OPPORTUNITY for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested
your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your
endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing
nothing.”

 I finished the book and realized how much I had circled and underlined after reading the pages. I realized how the whole book applied to the current situation. I realized how much God had to say to me.

 How do I consider difficult times an opportunity?

 I have no idea.

just one more of my questions but what I do know is that God is TRUTH and His word is Truth so in that case I will continually ask God to shaped who I am in a way that I consider trial an opportunity to learn. 

 Doesn’t it make sense to want to be in the struggle so that we can learn and grow? 

somewhere in the midst of it all, it does.