Crap

….is
what came out of our leader Kathryn’s mouth during out team
announcements back in October.

…….

“Crap.�

….is what came out of my mouth during
our team announcements back in October.

As we all huddled together, Kathryn
looked at us with a huge smile and full confidence in her voice. I
looked at everyone with hands shaking and a huge lump in my throat.

This was supposed to be our team�”our
family�”for the World Race….God what
the heck are you doing to me? This is not who I wanted.

(During
training camp, you’ve got to know the most anticipated announcement
for us racers is who our teams will be. We’re Christians, but we’re
also still humans: We judge. We compare. We complain. We pick
favorites. I know…it’s sad.)

Okay
so we know who our teammates are? Now what?
Oh yea, let’s do our
first team dinner. Duh. Sounds exciting…not.

I
found myself at Red Lobster with seven strangers, pretending to enjoy
my plate of under-cooked pasta and shrimp, and trying not to cuss at
life. (at least the cheese biscuits were promising, like they always
are at Red Lobster).

“Hey
guys I need to use the restroom, I’m not feeling the greatest today
for some reason,�
I told my team as I scurried off to the bathroom.

…..Holy
crybaby tears. I bawled like a baby. God
how the heck could you do this to me? I TRUSTED YOU! This isn’t even who I wanted for a team…

But
still, even though I was a big immature whiny baby, I decided alright; God fine…I’ll deal with it. But
this.just.SUCKS.

Fast
forward to January, the start of our World Race.

I still don’t
know why you put me with these people Lord, but…okay whatever, you
win.

You don’t even
know them. Just shut up already and watch what I’m about to do Liz!

….Yessir.

El
Salvador:
My team and I don’t even really talk to each other. This isn’t fun at
all. I’m annoyed.

Honduras:
Okay, I guess it’s a little better. But I’d rather hang out with so
and so than them.

Nicaragua:
I didn’t think we’d have this much fun but we are. We laugh all the
time. I guess I kind of like them. But I just don’t think I’m getting
challenged enough. I know team changes are coming up soon, but let’s
be honest. It’s probably going to be like a change here and there,
not anything too drastic. But still, I’m ready for a change, whatever
that looks like.

Sooo I’m
watching God, and it’s cool I guess, but I still feel like you’re not
really doing anything Lord….whatever…could you just change up my
team a bit? Thanks. Amen.

Fast
forward to April 3^rd:
Team Changes

We’re
all sitting there. Sweating our butts off, waiting in anticipation
once again.

….and
before I know it�”

“And
on my team I have Ada, Justin, Andrea, Paige, Joe and Peggy,�
is what came out of Kathryn’s mouth during team changes.

….

“Crap�
is what came out of my mouth during team changes.

Ummm, why do I all of a sudden care? It’s what I wanted right?

Team
Changes? Ummm yea right. Try more like Team Demolition. I didn’t
expect this at all.

Shoot. But God
I think I really do love them….Why did you answer my prayer? Okay
fine I take it back, I really do love them God! I’m just realizing it
a bit late that’s all, please God!

“…Crap.â€�
And so began the hands shaking and lump in the throat feeling once again.

It’s
like they say:

You never
realize how much you appreciate something until it’s gone.

I can’t tell you how true that cliché is in my life right now at
this very moment. God gave me people I didn’t think I could come even
close to loving. And then He took them away from me….and I’ve never
loved them more.

To
Team Ruah Elohim:

I’m
sorry for comparing.

I’m
sorry for complaining

I’m
sorry for judging.

I’m
sorry for picking favorites.

And
I love you guys so much.

These are my brothers and sisters. Having them taken away: It hurts. It sucks…But thank you for showing me that God. Lesson learned.