I enter the crowded room. I look around at the men present. There are a handful of women, but the majority are men. Most are struggling with some sort of addiction, many are dying of hepatitis or AIDS, all will be sleeping on the streets tonight. I know this is incredibly selfish, but as I look around the room all I can think of is how uncomfortable I am. This is definitely not a ministry within my comfort zone.
As the worship service begins, I feel a heaviness pressing down on my chest. I can feel the weight of bondage in the room. I feel the addiction, sin, despair, loneliness, etc. weighing me down. The weight is so heavy that it becomes difficult to breathe. All I can do is pray. Pray to break bondage and release the Lord’s freedom, replacing despair with God’s hope, replacing loneliness with the unconditional love of Christ. Words run out, but I still feel the burdens weighing down on me. All I know to do is to lift up the name of Jesus, to proclaim the power of His name. I begin to worship and lift up the name of the Lord. The heaviness begins to lift as Jesus inhabits the praises of His people.
The service is ending and it is time to pray with the men. Last time I was here I stood alone in the back praying over the service, not because I felt called to, but because I wasn’t ready to step out of my comfort zone. This time I dare to step out of my comfort zone loving those that my Jesus loves. I step forward to pray with a man who is coming to receive Christ. As I am walking to the back of the room another man grabs my hand. I look into his bloodshot eyes as he asks for prayer. We talk about his struggles and I pray with him. I continue to walk around the room praying with the men and women who have come to receive salvation, healing, restoration, and freedom.
As I take the hands of these precious people, hear their stories, pray for them, I realize that slowly my Lord is changing my heart. He is molding me into the image of His Son. He is increasing my capacity to love. I want to continue to live an “uncomfortable” life because it is outside of my comfort zone that I am changed into the image of my Savior.
