May 22, 2007
What does God want? What is He asking for from me? Something that has been getting drilled into us since we’ve arrived at Morrumbala is the idea that while we’re doing praise and worship, we need to be prophecying, we need to be shouting, we need to be “calling down fire.” Commands for the whole team to abide by. I know I’m sounding a bit cynical. I don’t believe this stuff is false, or whacked, or even radical… the Holy Spirit does manifest Himself in these ways.
I think it’s a deeper issue. And that is, what does God want for me? Among the shouts and commands for more, I’m seeking the still small voice of God who has been longing for me to come away with Him. So I guess the struggle isn’t with the shouting and prophecy, as much as it has to do with man.
At this point if I were to appear to “dig in” and “dive deeper” in worship, it would be to make the commands stop, not because it’s done out of an obedient heart to God. It wouldn’t be led by the Holy Spirit. Romans 12:1 says to “present yourself as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God- this is your spiritual act of worship.” I think we tend to label the time of singing, prophecy, and prayer as worship. It’s praise and worship, which is one way to surrender to the Lord. But we’re all called to BE worship, whether we’re holding an orphan, doing construction, preaching, singing, doing yoga (which Lynette and I have starting doing almost every day), or even sleeping! We are worship. Worship isn’t a designated time, it’s all the time, every day!
And God gave me a special word the other day, and that word was UNIQUE. God made us all especially different, with different personalities, different gifts, different talents, and and different ways He works in and through us. If there’s one thing I’ve learned about God, it’s that I can’t fit Him into any box I create for Him.
If someday God says hop on one foot, do a back flip, and then begin Riverdancing I will, and I’ll do it with joy! (Watch out, I may be an Irish step dancer by the time I get home.) But until then (and even after that point), I want to be led by the Holy Spirit. And right now, the Holy Spirit tells me wonderful secrets.
(Again on a side note: Our squad has discussed a lot of this stuff, and it turns out it’s less of an issue about styles of praise and worship, and more about the unity of the squad. So then the next question is how does one get to unity? How practically does the squad get unified? And what exactly is unity? Is it conformity? Or is it celebrating and embracing diversity? Biblical unity? Do we make everyone a hand, or do we make sure we’ve got all the body parts, and help eachother into those limbs? And do we even have a clue how to do that?)
