Taking a break from my office work at Hope Church, I walked into the sanctuary, looking for some peace and quiet. It was empty, except my squad-mate, Chandler, who was working away on his laptop. I sat on the step next to him, exhausted.
I asked him how his day was going, not really seeking a deep conversation and he filled me in on how the worship session I had to miss went and what God was teaching him.
And that's when God decided to reminded me of something I so desperately needed to hear at a time that I wanted to do nothing at all.
"I keep asking myself this question," Chandler said. "Is God enough for me. Clearly He is the Creator of the entire universe, but am I living in such a way that even if God gave me absolutely nothing that my heart desired–a wife, a family, a comfortable life–would I still be happy?"
WHAM!
I was feeling exactly like Chandler was and I didn't even realize it.
Would I be happy if I woke up on my 80th birthday and never accomplished the things I wanted to? What if I never got married? What if I was never able to be a mother? What if I never was able to get a job that made a comfortable salary? The list goes on and on. But would I still be content with my life?
Because right now, I am living my life in a way that I am seeking the things I want in place of seeking God himself. I keep finding myself saying things like, "When I ___________, then I will be truly be happy." You can fill that blank in with a million things: get married, have children, have a job, start my own children's camp, get to drink red Gatorade again. The list is endless.
But the way that sentence should read is, "When I seek God with everything and live my life in His presence, then I will be truly happy.
And while I still want all of those things, I can say the answer is: yes…God is enough for me.
Even if I never had a husband, children or a 401K, God would still be there! Even if every single bad thing I could imagine happened in my life, GOD WOULD STILL BE THERE! How amazing is that?!
But what is even more amazing is that God isn't going to give me horrible things. Jeremiah 29:11 says, "For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope."
He has a world full of plans for me! I should never limit myself to the plans I have when the plans he has will be so much better.
So yes, I may never have the exact life I want but God is going to grow me into a person who can appreciate the life He gives me. It will be a great life because even if I had nothing, God is still my everything!
