Dear future husband,
I’m not waiting for you. And I hope you’re not waiting for me either.
I’m not talking about sex either. Although speaking of that matter I could care less if you’ve been with 100 girls and/or boys or 0, because God has redeemed me of so much, I know that He is quite capable to wash your slate clean too.
I never do this. I hate rom-coms, chick flicks, flowers and chocolate- gag. Don’t get me wrong, I love love, but because you’ve always seemed so far off I’ve distanced myself from the promise of you so far that I have created a habit of keeping you at an arms length. I rarely acknowledge you. I didn’t want to believe in the promise out of heartbreak, but I’ve come to realize that it was the distance that broke my heart instead.
It was easy to accept the Race, everyone said to me “but what if you meet someone?!” I would laugh and say “have you seen my track record? I’m not worried about that..”
At the time, I wanted to run away from the thought of marriage. I forced myself to believe that I didn’t want to be a wife. So even though the Race was His will for me all along, I also used it to run away from the thought of you.
Over the last few weeks, He’s brought me back to the promise. I apologize for trying to forget about you. But I’ve learned a valuable lesson while I’m here following Gods will, serving the orphans in Africa and climbing mountains I’ve only dreamed of. I’m glad I’m here. I’m glad I didn’t wait for you. And I hope you’re not waiting for me either. I hope you’re living life and chasing dreams and doing things that He’s called you to whether I’m by your side or not. I hope you get to the point where you don’t seek affirmation from anyone or anything else because you know that He is all you need. I want you to be a whole person, a free person, before we ever say our vows.
Sure, pray for me, bother God about the promise-
“Day and night they keep at it, praying, calling out, reminding GOD to remember. They are to give him no peace until he does what he said.”
Isaiah 62:6-7
-but don’t idolize the promise. Just because He’s promised you a wife doesn’t mean life doesn’t start until that moment. You don’t want to settle- great! But in this waiting process, make the most of it. God’s got a whole life for you to live. Your life started the day you were born, so make your goals and chase your dreams. He’s created you for a purpose and I hope you’re so busy chasing that purpose that I’m an afterthought.
Our forever isn’t the goal in life, it’s not what we were created for. It’s just the cherry on top, just a bonus. He’s created us for so much more.
He knows what we need and His timing is perfect. I look forward to meeting you, but don’t wait up.
Love,
Linds
(The irony of our clashing titles is hilarious. I’ve always loved this poem, watch till the end. She speaks truth and brings the fire.)
