My week of prospective.
My week to look back on the past 3 weeks and be the judge of my actions and behavior.
This week is 6 days of race community, awesome worship, new opportunities, and Great reminders. It’s called “Project Search Light.” The last leg on my World Race Journey.
I didn’t want to come. I had already gotten back into “normal life.” I had already had my gym routine down and I had made a schedule for myself.
The thing is I signed up month 7 for PSL booked my tickets month 8, and there is no way I was going to waste 400 dollars on a plane ticket, so I had to go.
I had come home without going through culture shock. I came home feeling thrown back into the world. I came back to a place with no community. I had no one fighting for the things that I learned on my race to stay alive in me. I had began to feel as if I “truly” learned nothing. My parents began to question what had changed in me because my actions weren’t always a reflection of the change. I found myself a few times coming in to agreement with the World and things that it had to offer.
I got back into the habit of hanging out with my secular friends and using the line “trust me I’m strong enough that they won’t bring me down.” When truly I was allowing a little more than I should’ve. I found that in conversations about my trip I talked more about what I did than what God did in me. I truly believe that God did more in me than what God did through me and I WAS LEAVING THAT PART OUT. I was leaving out God in my trip.
Satan lies began to speak to me saying “Lexi you didn’t change!” ” Lexi you have already come back to being the same person that you were before.” ” Lexi your 9 months really meant nothing spiritually it was just adventure and you are the same now.”
And the sad thing was I believed them…. Until I came to PSL.
So the second night of being here, I had a dream. I had a dream about snakes. So let me quickly preface that in Dalhart, there has been a small problem throughout the whole town with rattle snakes, not just out in the country in town too. So here’s my dream:
I was walking around, and wherever I went these snakes followed, I couldn’t escape them. I knew that they were poisonous, I knew that if they bit me it would be bad. So I tried to get in higher places or go safer places, but no matter what I did they wouldn’t leave. They were EVERYWHERE!!! But at the end of the dream I had finally lost them and I knew that they were all gone.
When I woke up my heart was beating and I related it back to what it could be, the snake problem back at home. For some reason it kept coming back up throughout the day. That night at worship God did crazy things through prayer. People began to ask prayer for all sorts of things like spiritual healing and physical. God spoke to me about my dream and said those snakes represent Satan, Satan has been attacking you these past 3 weeks and you haven’t been able to even see it. I have given you this dream to show you that in every area he has been there, now ask for prayer. I was embarrassed in that I began to sob ( mind you im usually only emotional for Jesus). Darby came up and asked what was wrong and I finally got the humility to ask for prayer of this.
After praying and talking it over with God I knew that I was released of this attack. I knew that I had WON! I won the battle that was already won on the cross.
” The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly” – John 10:10
God showed me why I was supposed to be here this week. He took me out of my “already settled in home life.” And gave me a perspective of what it could be through and with him in it.
I will not live a mediocre life. I may be in this world but Y’all I am CERTAINLY not going to be of it.
“Because, the one that lives in you is greater than the one that lives in the World” – John 4:4
I’m finally COMPLETELY jumping in and running after the calling. I want to tell and share what Jesus did through me on the race. I want to live and mirror Jesus. I want to be a waking powerhouse for the spirit.
I’m thankful that I went with an organization that has this week. It has given not me perspective on my life now, but also perspective for the future. If it wasn’t for this week I don’t know that I would be waking in his greatness and his plan for much longer than I thought I was at home.
