This frightens me even thinking about it. I cannot believe that I am about 5 months away from leaving. I have been hesitant at times. I have questioned God and wondered “Why me?” I have wished and hoped that I could come visit weekends and holidays. I have pondered what it would be like if I would have chose college for my first year, But it all comes down to it is not about me. It is about picking up and following what the Lord has for me.
“Know therefore that the Lord your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to thousand generations of those who love him and obeys his commands” Deuteronomy 7:9
In this I find hope, in this I rejoice that the Lord chose me. I know that I will start to miss home, but then the Lord will remind me why I went. I know that when I think about how I would be at college already establishing my career, and then the Lord promises me that I will have time to do that. He will remind me that If I follow him on this one and let him lead the way that he will bless me.
I have already been blessed and saw how the Lord works, and just how good he is. I have reached 8,050 of 12,491. I cannot believe that in just a few short months I already have raised that much. I know that I didn’t do it on my own that it was all God. I am meant to go. As much as it scares me to death, I know that I am meant to and I will.
I think of how I undeserving I am often, I think about all the times that I failed the Lord. All of the times that I haven’t acted like I should’ve or I have said things I should not have. Yet he still blesses me. Just this Sunday the youth band got the chance to lead worship, I always feel the Lord move more when I am up there playing. Yeah I may not have the best of voice but theres nothing I love more than singing praises and grasping the concepts of what I am saying. I caught myself in awe as I sang the words “You are good you are good when theres nothing good in me” He is so good to me yet I am so unworthy of that.
I haven’t blogged in a while, so I thought I would give you an update. Keep me in your prayers as well as my parents as they go crazy in preparation of sending their “baby” off in a few months. Continue to pray for donations and fundraisers. I am so close yet still have all the other accessories. I know that the money will come all in his perfect timing. Thank you for the continuous support I could not do it with out you guys Love and encouragement,
Lexi
