I told y’all I would keep you updated on my process of processing my dad’s death…I said this in this blog.
Something I realized is that in the last blog I kept calling the depiction of my dad “dad” but in reality it was a demonic representation of my dad that I had let take residence in my heart.
But after the previous blog I went to my squads debrief where I had it declared over me by many people that I would leave Africa full of peace and joy.
I knew this was true because I heard it from God too.
So, after debrief I went into Malawi with already knowing how the month would go with my walk with God and where I would end up spiritually. And I was EXCITED!!!
During my teams first worship night in Malawi I heard God tell me that I needed to write my final letter to get rid of the demonic representation of my dad and break down the walls to be fully in the presence of God.
So, I wrote the letter, and then I asked “okay, God what do I do with it now?”
His answer “chill out, I’ll tell you when it is time.”
Probably a week later I heard God again telling me what to do with this letter and how the moment is between him, my dad, and me. So, I will not explain what he had me do.
All I will say is I walked into a field a very sad person and walked out of it 30 minutes later full of peace and joy.
It was an amazing experience.
I now dance in praise for God. I now sing louder about how much I love him. I now hear him clearer.
I want my relationship to continue to grow with God and I pray every day to learn something new about him. I pray for him to speak to me daily. I want God to be my new best friend.
Now, here I am in Ukraine where I have been so filled of joy that at times I can’t control how happy I am…..it makes for great moments for my teammate Andy to film. (you can check them out here on his youtube channel.)
