Since month one I have had this overwhelming feeling that the Lord was going to give me a new name, so living in expectancy I was constantly praying and listening…waiting for Him to drop the coolest name known to man.
This month He spoke to me and called me Leondra.
Not quite what I was expecting either, so I prayed again. Again, He called me Leondra.
Okay God…”what does this mean?”
Slowly I begin to understand. I have been running away from my name for a long time; there are probably only a handful of people that call me Leondra regularly. When people ask me if I like my name, I always say yes. I think that it is a cool name, it is unique and is beautiful but for me the name Leondra always carried a lot of weight, and I never really liked it for myself.
My father’s name is Leonard and ever since I was little I people would make the connection that our names are basically the same, just with a few letters moved around. So people would always say that it was cute and awesome that I got to be named after him.
I would stand there and smile in agreement.
But on the inside I would be screaming in disagreement. Shouting you literally have no idea…
I remember being called LeeLee by my family, then in high school some people called me Leo, and still LeeLee remained. When I went to college Lee was my new name. The last seven years I have been called Lee by everyone I know, but since being on the race it really never sounded right.
Lee is not me.
Right before the race being called Lee left a bad feeling in my gut…I was loosing sight of who He has called me to be, chains were forming and my vision was distorted. Lee was left blind, alone, afraid, and confused.
I remember thinking this is not me.
So I asked God, “who is Lee?”
He said…
Leondra is mine.
Leondra is gentle.
Leondra is loved.
Leondra is kind.
Leondra is necessary.
These are only some of the truths that He has speaking to me throughout this month!
So now I am fully embracing me. Fully embracing Leondra and all that He has called me to be.
With that comes healing in my and my father’s relationship…since I am named after him.
This past father’s day was the first time I have told him ‘Happy Father’s Day’ in a very long time.
As I begin to see myself as the Lord sees me, I am also able to see others how He sees them!
I am striving to be the fullest, truest version of Leondra. I know that He has created me to be more, and that He calls me to be more.
So with that said…
Hello, My name is Leondra and it is very nice to meet you!
