My only bathroom was a porter potty, I didn’t shower for a week, I ate almost every meal with my hands, and somehow it still turned out to be one of the best weeks ever!
Nerves invaded my body the night before leaving for the Beauty for Ashes Retreat*, the feeling of not being prepared took over every part of my being(I will admit that I did wait till the last minute to pack, which I will not do for the race). I sat on my bed completely packed and with a sigh of relief said “ O.K Lord, do with me this week as you please, break me to make me whole!” For some reason I wasn’t expecting him to do that. He broke me down in a quiet and tender way; no tear filled days (well just one), no anger or fear. He came to me, grabbed my hand, and we begin to walk.
Over the course of 10 days, He again and again poured me out and filled me up. He got to the places that I was unaware of, He showed me what it feels like to be completely overtaken by His spirit, He showed me that a life of simplicity is doable. Most importantly He showed me what it is like to live in a community that is so crazy and head over heels for the Lord, that enjoys dance parties, laughing, and candy just as much as I do.
The Lord reminded me of one of my favorite passages; Ezekiel 37: 1- 14. Ezekiel is taken out in the Spirit of the Lord to the valley of dry bones, the Lord encourages Ezekiel to prophesy over the dry bones and as he does flesh and skin begin to cover the bones. Then the Lord tells him to prophesy breath into them, and as he did they lived and stood to their feet. Lastly the Lord tells Ezekiel that He is going to put His Spirit into this now great army. “Then you shall know that I am the Lord…”*
Before applying for the world race, even three weeks before leaving for training camp I felt dried up, hopeless and lost. I knew with complete faith that the World Race was the next chapter for me, but I had no idea how He would use my dried up spirit. Throughout training camp He spoke life and truth to me, He broke me and called me into a life of light, truth and grace. He used training camp to show me that He is for me and that He is a Good Good Father!
Training camp was hard, I was exhausted emotionally, physically, and spiritually. At times I didn’t want to be vulnerable, or talk about how I was feeling, I didn’t want to dance( but I did). It was hard and long, but absolutely worth it. I have been wrecked from the bottom to the top, He helped me open my heart and live life with 50 other people. He loved me so well this week and showed me what it is like to be loved and love others without limitations.
He did some work at training camp, I am still processing and re-reading journal entries so stay tuned for another entry soon.
*Beauty for Ashes: Retread for future female racers held by Adventures in Missions.
*Ezekiel 37:14
