I did it!! I finally wrote a blog about Thailand…you’re welcome! Haha!!
Sorry it took me so long to do. To be frank I was avoiding it. My first month here was a struggle. Exhaustion took over. Negativity surrounded me. I hated the attitude that was developing and hated the fact that I was struggling so much when I really just wanted to jump in full force and care for all those around me. The more I tried to get out of this cycle the more exhausted I became.
Back in Guatemala we became very independent. Our host shared that he sees us as adults and that he wanted to treat us as so- so he provided a house, a driver and a simple schedule. With that we were free to manage everything else. We learned to do full time ministry as teachers and come home to normal responsibilities of having a house. We had to figure out what to teach and how we were going to do that with what we had. We adjusted to having the responsibilities of having a home and a family to take care of. Groceries? Yep, we walked into town and carried them back since we didn’t have a car. Meals were planned, prepared and eaten by us. So coming here was shocking when we were given a beautiful house with fans and AC that was also on the same property of the church we are working with and our host’s home. We no longer had the freedom we became accustomed to. For the first time in three months we were back to being treated as kids and employees when it came to ministry. Our meals were made for us. We had a strict schedule to follow and house guidelines. After a couple days we adjusted and then ministry in the schools began. Perfection. Perfection was asked from the very beginning. As soon as we arrived we were asked to complete any task given to us as if it was our profession. We no longer were just college students winging teaching English, but we now were professional English teachers. Everyday we were to attend a new school and teach “basic” English and then put on a afternoon program that would last two and a half hours. We had to come up with a curriculum that matched over 17 schools ranging from Kindergarden to university students. For never doing anything like that before we did really good! But our host didn’t agree. Time after time our best efforts were met with “feedback” on what we needed to change and improve on. We couldn’t keep up. Discouragement and frustration took over. We all wanted to do our best. We wanted to make a difference. We wanted to make the most of our time here and yet we continually were reminded of our failure. God was faithful to bring encouragement and joy into our ministry. A team from the organization YWAM came and joined our team in ministry for two weeks- and that time was filled with fun moments and encouragement. Our (silent) prayers were answered.
On the 24th of December our team was told that we must leave in five days to go to Laos to apply for visas. Tears filled my eyes when I heard the news. For three days I get a mini vacation. My time in Laos provided the time to process and take a moment to reflect on the past couple weeks. If I could pick one word to describe my time in Laos it would be renewing. Encouragement and truth was spoken to me over this time from so many of my squad mates. My vision was restored and a passion that I once had was fueled again in me. And boy did I miss it!
Yes, our ministry is still very challenging and exhausting. But I can say with joy that everyday we give it to Christ and everyday we accomplish our purpose. The students may walk out of class not knowing a single word in English, but they sure do know what a good time looks like during English class!
I struggled as I wrote this post. I want to share this journey with you, but I also do not want to be misunderstood nor give the wrong perception of my time here. Though I cannot convey the true journey if I don’t share every part of this crazy adventure to proclaim the gospel to the nations. That includes the movements of joy, thanksgiving, fun memories and experiences, but also the struggles that come as I live in Guatemala, Thailand and Zambia!! (Forgot to tell you back in September, BUT our route was changed the day before launch from Botswana to Zambia….surprise!!! Haha!) Please know that I have enjoyed my time in Thailand. I have learned so much and grown so close to my teammates. Ministry isn’t my favorite, but I love the growth that has been given through this time. I’m so thankful for my team of girls who are willing to give it their all even when we all are ready to give up. Thankful for their encouragement and the way they lean on Christ when it could be so easy to check out. Thank you for all those who have been praying for me. I have felt your prayers and am so grateful for you all.
This week marked the half way point not just for my time in Thailand, but for the whole Gap Year! Time sure is a fly’n!
Prayer Requests
That my team and myself will continue to push into our time here and not coast through as we are coming up to the end. (Only three weeks left of my ministry here until I meet up with my parents in Chang Mai for The Parent Vision Trip!)
That Christ will be glorified in all we do and that we will speak boldly as we share the gospel for the first time in over 30 schools during our time here.
My squad leader Moe’s fundraising. She needs to raise $1,600 by April for her time here.
My parents as they prepare to come and see me!! That we all will hang strong as it gets closer and closer! I really really really cannot wait to see them! It will be 5 months to the day since I have seen them! Ahh!
Protection from illness and those who want to stop our work.
Endurance through the stress and loneliness that comes when obeying God’s calling while away from familiar faces and culture.
The Lord to sustain our relationship with him and each other.
Thank you!! God bless!!
