“It is a fire no one wants to put out”
The first night I went to bar ministry this month I had a short conversation with a man from Laos at the last bar we went to for the night. He asked me in a confused way, “why are you here?” It was obvious he was not there to purchase a women, like some of the men aren’t they are just out to get a drink or hang out. I asked him if anyone does anything to help these women find other jobs or give them new opportunities. And he responded with, “It is a fire that no one wants to put out or mess with.” I responded with, “the fire will just get bigger if no one does anything or fights for change and hope.” He said, “exactly – no one wants to get burned by it.”
^ One of the bar streets in Chaing Mia that my team and I would go to.
This conversation set a fire in me even stronger than the one I had when I left that night for the first night of bar ministry. December was my favorite month on the race so far. It was absolutely amazing. It was an honor and privilege to meet and form friendships with the women and lady boys (cross-dressers) that work in the Red Light District in Chaing Mia. I can’t describe how special and real the relationships I formed this month with the workers at Zion Cafe and in the Red Light District. I will never forget the people I met there.
God answered my prayers for the opportunity to do human trafficking/bar ministry on the race – above and beyond my expectations. The Red Light district, brothels, and clubs are different in every country, city, and area. In the Chaing Mia area we went to the bars in groups of two or three and bought a girl or lady boy a drink for the opportunity to talk with them for 15-20 minutes. We could not stay longer to talk with them because they are paid by the number of drinks bought for them for the night. Or until they are purchased by someone to go back to their hotel room for the night. It would not be in favor with the bar moms or pimps to keep them any longer while they are working.
That was all we had – 20 minutes to figure out any language barriers, let them know we just wanted to talk with them and not buy them for the night, and to show them God’s love and hope. God did amazing things in those 20 minute conversations with the people I met and with the rest of my team. The goal of Light House in Action is to build relationships with the girls and lady boys over the entire month and eventually bring them to Zion Cafe to meet Pi Emmi, who is in charge of Light House in Action and Zion, and form a connection for them after we leave. Thai people are very slow to change, it was important to build their trust for any real change to happen.
Prayer was a huge way I grew this month. We were required to do a prayer walk in the area we would be going to at night if we signed up for bar ministry that day. We had at least two people interceding on behalf of the group who went out at night the entire time a group was doing bar ministry. The only way we accomplished anything this month was through God and prayer. I experienced the power of prayer in new ways and having to listen to God moment to moment while I was out at the bars.
The first night I went out was with my teammate Brittany. I had mixed feelings of excitement, uncertainty, and the unknown. Unknown about what we were going to experience, talk about, and who we were going to meet. I felt a lot peace and strength that God was with us. The empowerment that comes from going into a dark place with the hope and joy of Jesus is a feeling that can only come from the Holy Spirit. And the peace that God gives you that He will take care of you and protect you from any harm. We were told to go out with the joy and hope of Christ and to not let what was going on around us affect our mood or let the darkness that surrounded us weigh us down.
The first night out we met three girls and one lady boy that we felt a connection with. We were unsure how the second interaction would be with them and if they would even remember us. The next time I saw them a couple days later at the bars they work at, I was given a warm welcome and a huge hug. They were so excited to see us. Over time we learned about their families, children, and more about their lives and how they ended up working at the bars. We developed real friendships with them by taking them out to coffee, lunch, and even gave them presents on Christmas day! The conversations were effortless – like talking to a new friend filled with laughter, real talk, and the atmosphere of a safe and comfortable space.
We were able to introduce three of the women to Pi Emmi – who is in charge of Zion Cafe after taking them to a lunch at Zion. Fortunately there are other mission teams working at Zion that we were able to introduce the people we have met to them so they can continue the relationships after we left.
All of the women and the lady boy we met have made a huge impact on me. Entering this month I never thought I would form a friendship with a lady boy in Thailand. It was way too intimidated by it and thought I wouldn’t know how to relate to them. The first night out we met a lady boy and there was an instant comfortability and connection. She was extremely sweet, genuine, and caring. She opened up to us how her life felt hopeless. And explained that she supports her parents and siblings through working at the bar. She is the oldest son and is expected to support her family. During our last night of bar ministry she shared her story with us and how she ended up working at the bars and that she does not want to be there. She began tearing up sharing her story with us. We learned about her hopes and dreams. And how she feels ashamed and is a “bad person” for working at the bar. We told her how awesome she is and that we know she is not a bad person and how she has worth and value. She told us how she felt a special connection with us and that we were real friends. She has such a sweet and caring spirit – it broke my heart to hear her story and see how completely hopeless and trapped she is in this lifestyle. It was one of the hardest goodbyes on the race so far. Fortunately we introduced her to other missionaries who are staying in Chaing Mia for another month. Only through God can a relationship like that be formed over such a short amount of time. He transformed my eyes and thoughts to see the people working in the bars as sons and daughters of God which allowed for me to care for them in a way I never thought was possible.
The other women we met had similar stories of working in the bars to support their family and children. One girl we met was 19 years old and had only been working in the bars for three months – she shared how she has to be strong and work their to make money to take care of herself and her sister. She told us how she lives a “sad life” working in the bars and you could see the struggle she has by telling herself she didn’t have any other options. She told us how an older man from Switzerland, who met her through Facebook, was trying to get her to come to Bangkok to work for him in a video project. She showed us his Facebook and messages between them. It was obvious it was a trap to get her to come to Bangkok and likely traffic her. Other people on my team met girls who ended up working at the bars from men who brought them from villages after being promised a job as a waitress or in a hotel and are now stuck working the bars. We met other girls who were in strange and unsettling relationships with foreign men, who worked as “internet sales” in Chaing Mia, a job description we heard from a variety of men with the same description and wording.
The human trafficking I pictured before Chaing Mia was different in my mind. The one I experienced here was unreal how easy, convenient, and common it happens. The society here has so much apathy for the human trafficking and sex industry here that it is does not require much effort to traffic someone. We have seen the effects working in the bars causes these people. They feel worthless, hopeless, have low self esteem, and feel trapped. Even when they are presented the opportunity to leave and have a new job some feel that they aren’t worthy to leave the life they have become comfortable with. It is a deeply rooted insecurity and brainwash that affects them on a great scale. Even though they are sad, hopeless, and ashamed to be working there they do not know how to restore their life. Finding a new job won’t fix the damage and hurt that came from working in the bars. Only the hope and love of Jesus can show them their real worth and value.
I could share story after story of the women and men my team and I met this month. (Two girls on my team befriended a bartender who came to Zion everyday after meeting them and came to the bus station to say goodbye to us when we left – it was amazing.) God is working in Chaing Mia. Through one relationship and friendship at a time people are being restored, given hope, and a new life in Christ. It was hard to leave Chaing Mia with our friends still working in the bars, but we are just a piece of the puzzle in God’s greater plan for their life. It was a privilege to have the opportunity to love on them, take them out to coffee, and hear their stories in a safe and comfortable place. To tell them that they are amazing people who are worth more than what society and people tell them and to make them feel valued because of God’s love. We got to share with them the meaning of Christmas and gave them a present on Christmas day. I am so thankful my hope and trust is in God’s hand to send more people to Chaing Mia to continue these relationships and to stir the hearts of the people we met to remember something different about us and to know that it was God’s love pouring out of us onto them.
Sticker on the bar street we would go to – "real men don't buy girls"
