In my last blog you read how God has called me to give my whole life to Him. He has called me to live a life that is worthy of His calling (Eph. 4:1) and He has called me into an intimate relationship with Him. This year is set apart for figuring out how to do that. Some of these lessons are harder than others. Some are simple, but take a while to have that lightbulb go off in your head.
One of these simple lessons that took me until last week to really understand is the concept of free will. I have always heard about free will. God gave us all free will. He can’t force us to love Him. He wants us to choose Him. Yeah, all this was great. Bruce Almighty even did a fairly decent job of demonstrating free will as God can’t force us to love Him. However, when it came right down to it either I never got it, or somewhere along the way I had forgotten about it. I was having a rough time, recognizing that it was 2 weeks until my now non-existent wedding and so God and I were having a little “chat”. This is when He taught me to truly about the concept of free will. Let me show you the conversation:
L: Why am I out here in the wilderness? Why am I here all year and NOT getting married? Why did you have to bring me here?
G: This was your choice. You CHOSE to break up with him and come on the race.
L: But you told me I had to. You MADE me.
G: You chose to listen.
L: I had to. It’s your way or nothing. You are kind of clear about that.
G: It’s funny how free will works. You CHOSE.
And that’s when it clicked. I have free will. Free will doesn’t mean that God can’t force me to love Him. It means I can do whatever I want to. God has given me the option not only in how I will view Him, or if I will even acknowledge His presence, but He has given me the option to listen to Him or not. He has promised in Isaiah 30:21 to always show us the direction that He wants us to go in, but He will never make our decision to follow. He wants us to follow, and it will always bring us life and joy when following Him. You can’t go wrong in choosing to listen and obey because God knows the big picture, and He knows the best route for you to take. He has plans to prosper us and NOT to harm us (Jer. 29:11). He has the whole map, and we only have the first turn or two. He knows where to go, but He doesn’t force us to go there. We have the option. I chose to listen to God’s voice and come on the World Race. I chose to be here, and I choose to stay. I have chosen to listen to God, and it has worked out so amazingly. I listened to God and now I am travelling the world. How cool is that?
Part of being able to trust God to do what is best for us requires knowing the love He has for us. This is another lesson I have begun learning this year. This year is about really understanding the things I have been told all my life. God loves you. Jesus loves you. Yeah yeah, I have heard it all before. It gets a little repetitive. But I never really understood it. I’m not sure I quite understand it yet. But I am starting to, at least some days. God loves ME. God loves the world. Well great. It feels sometimes like we are all lumped into “the world” that He loves, but you know, He is just kind of up there running the show. There are 6 billion people or something, and that’s not counting anyone in history. Even David asked in Psalm 144:3 why God loves people. But I am starting to understand that God love ME. He loves Laura. Ok so He loves everyone else too. But if there was no one else on earth He would have still put all of the beauty here just for me. He made me in His own image (Gen. 1). I am like God. He has given me His best qualities. To look at me is to be able to see God. God put Himself into ME! He knit me together, He knows my name, He knows how many hairs are on my head. He knows when I sit and when I stand, He knows all of my thoughts. He brought me to existence and He loves me. Zephaniah 3:17 is my new favourite verse because it reminds me of how God loves me. It says:
The Lord your God is with you; the mighty One will save you. He will rejoice over you. You will rest in His love, He will sing and be joyful about you.
How beautiful! God sings about me!
Through this I am trying to find my identity in Christ. I am trying to know myself. I am trying to find out who it is that God made me to be, and to realize that I have an impact on people. I have started this journey, and as I continue to grow this year, I’m sure I will discover my true identity.
