I have been home for a week now, and I am realizing just how much transition time it will take for me to adjust back to life here. Transitions have never been easy for me. You would think that as a military kid, I would be used to moving from one place to another, one stage of life to another, one group of people to the next. But I’m not. The truth is that transitions are always pretty difficult times for me. I hate goodbyes, (or “see ya laters” as Allie would say,) and I hate the empty feeling that lingers after one season of life transitions into another.
This is a time of transition and of grieving for me…not that home hasn’t been amazing, it really has. I love being with my family and being able to share stories and pictures with them and learn what the Lord has been doing in their lives. I love being able to celebrate the incredible work that the Lord did over the past four months with my family and my home church. But at the same time, a part of me grieves not having the team/family that has been with me 24/7 for the last 4 months. I know that I will adjust, and that home will feel like home again, but right now America feels foreign, my home feels quiet and my life feels empty without people and places that I grew to dearly love. My heart feels torn in so many different directions… I left a part of my heart in each place we ministered, and my heart is being pulled in several different directions here in the states as well.
I continually get asked the question, “how was your trip?” Seems like a pretty simple question, but I always find myself speechless in response. No amount of words can really describe how I was impacted and changed in four months. This trip was eye opening, motivating, life changing…you can’t see the things that I saw, or talk to the women that I talked to, or hold the children that I held, and not be forever changed. I can’t have these experiences and then walk away saying “well, that was a good trip, now on to my normal life…” I just can’t. I firmly believe that the Lord has forever changed my passion and the direction of my life in these last four months, and that in the days ahead He will begin revealing His will for how I can use what I have learned to continue to further His Kingdom on whatever path He leads me.
I know that during this transition the Lord has called me to a time of waiting on Him, and resting in Him. I didn’t realize how much of a challenge that would be after 4 months of constantly doing. I am realizing more and more how difficult it is for me to just sit and rest and not do. As I wait on His direction for the next step in my journey, I ask that you would be praying with me. Pray that I hear His voice clearly and that I am not quick to make a decision for the future based on how I feel or what I want. Pray that I will use this time I have been given to find rest and to truly debrief and process what I have seen and experienced over the last four months. Pray that I will hold onto the life changing things that I have learned and that I will not let them slip by the wayside simply because I am back in America and life looks different here. I want to hold on to that desperate dependence on the Lord that I found to be so necessary in ministry both overseas and in the U.S. I want to catch His vision for my life, whatever that looks like, and run with it; never looking back. Most of all, I want to continue to bring His Kingdom wherever I am.
Thank you so much for your prayers for me over the last four months – I mean it with all of my heart when I say I know that it was because of prayer that we were able to do and see and experience all that we did, and make it home safely. I ask that you continue to pray with me as the Lord directs my path.
As I make the transition home, I am also transitioning blogs. If you want to continue to keep up with me and my journey with the Lord, I will be posting future blogs on www.laurajhamilton.wordpress.com. I invite you to visit the page and enter your e-mail address in the subscription box to receive e-mail alerts when I post new blogs.
May the Lord’s richest blessings rest upon each of you who supported me in prayer, financially and by encouraging me throughout this incredible journey.
My amazing team at our final debrief in Stone Mountain
