It's been a great day full of God's glory shining down. God's been delivering me through some really deep and really rough heart issues. He has today healed me of so much and brought me to a place of complete peace.
I awoke from a nap this afternoon to the sound of worship coming from our dining area. I couldn't resist laying in bed any longer and went to go worship with my fellow squad mates. The Holy Spirit was really radiating and coming down in that place. It was a great time of worship.
Sitting there at the table singing my heart out, my squad leader Jeff came in with his cell phone and asked me to step outside. "Holli said that you need to call your mom." Jeff told me. I already knew what it was about…my grandfather. My dad's father has been sick for some time now. He's developed Alzheimer disease and that combined with his age and other illnesses makes for a bad time. I knew what this phone call was about. What I didn't know was the gift that God had put behind it.
I called my mom and she asked if AIM had told me. I told her, no they hadn't, but I had guessed what it was about. "Hospice was in earlier and they've given him 24 hours." she said starting to cry. "And Kyle for the past week he's been asking the question, "Where is he?" We couldn't figure out who he was talking about. Everybody has seen him…all of his friends and of course the family. Yesterday someone suggested that he was talking about you and that's what we've figured he's been asking. Where is Kyle?" My heart sank to the ground and I began to cry. Every time I've spoken to my grandfather on the race he's always asked me where I was and wanted to know when I would be home. It's always devastated him when I told him it would be months before I'd see him again. One time he even started to ask me to come home then. I knew it was an attack from the enemy though. His Alzheimer’s getting the best of him.
The question he was asking, "Where is he?" struck a very special place in my heart. You see I grew up thinking that my grandparents didn't really want me around. Being the second youngest grandson I felt as though I was often forgotten about. It was just another lie the enemy has fed me and I've bought in to. This proves that. It breaks my heart knowing that for at least a week straight my grandfather in a very critical state would continue asking where I was because he wanted to see me. But this story gets even more heart breaking than that.
Mom told me to call back in 30 minutes and she would drive back to my grandparents house, where my dad was, and let me talk to my grandfather one last time. So I waited 30 minutes and spent that time with God, praying over my grandfather, my family, and myself. Asking him tough questions like, "Should I go home?" I called back 30 minutes later and dad answered the phone and told me that my grandfather was awake and I could talk to him, but he probably wouldn't talk back.
I heard the phone go on speaker mode and dad faintly say, "Okay Kyle, you can talk to him."
"Hey Papaw, this is Kyle. I'm in Swaziland, which is in Africa. I'm on top of a mountain and just got done watching a beautiful sunset." I said as I began to start weeping. Listening on the other line and I heard my grandfather's voice whisper, "It's him!" clear as day. My heart sank to the floor and I almost lost it.
"Keep talking to him Kyle." my dad said. I couldn't do it. Not after that. I wasn't sure what to say.
After a few moments of silence my dad got back on the phone and said, "Did you hear what he said? He told you hello! He recognized your voice." I thought for a second and asked Dad to put me back on speaker mode so that my grandfather could hear me.
"Hey Papaw, this is Kyle again. I'm in Swaziland, which is in Africa. I just wanted you to know that I'm going to be coming home real soon, but you might beat me there. Just do me a favor and give Jesus a big hug for me. I love you."
A few moments later dad came back on the phone and with a quivering voice told me that my grandfather heard me. He continued on to say how peaceful he looked and told me that he wasn't in any pain at all.
I asked my dad how he was doing and he told me he was alright, just that things were a little hard right then. Earlier that day God had told me to tell my father something that I was suppose to tell him 2 years ago, but have always passively avoided it. "Dad I've got something I have to tell you, and while I've got you on the phone I want to do it now. I just want you to know that you really have been a great father and I'm glad that you're my dad. I hope you really do believe that." Weeping my dad said, "Thanks Kyle, you've been a good son." We both weren't really sure what to say after that, but I feel it was a step closer to complete healing for the both of us.
