I'm tired…tired of running from thing to thing, idol to idol, comfort to comfort. All of my life I've been running to the thing I think will make me most happy. Why? Because I've been taught to do that; the "American Dream". It's something that has been so engrained in me…in all of us. The pursuit of happiness! What a load of crap! – or is it? Sitting here in Swaziland I'm beginning to process the bigger, deeper issue that has been welling up within me most of my life: what will make me happy? Having grown up in America with almost any desire I could ever desire at my finger tips and having spent the past 7 months in some of the most corrupt and poorest third world countries in the world you would think that I would have that question figured out by now and I think I have to some degree. But the answer is so simple yet extremely complex. The answer is the pursuit of knowing God to my heart's utmost desire. Here's the problem…I don't know how to do that! Every time I think I have it figured out, it changes drastically. I've been to some of the most beautiful places in the world doing ministry and have had all of my needs provided for yet at the same time have been miserable. I think the reason why is because I've been trying to take control of the things God has given me and left Him in the dust. The only way for me to find this happiness I'm looking for is to drop my pride and right to control things and just do life with God. That's where I'm at right now. Trying to stop running from God and walking with Him instead. I'm currently at $12,435 out if the $15,500. I need to stay in the race. If your interested in donating to my account you can click the "Support Me!" tab on the left hand side if the page. Thanks!
