I promised an update with an explanation on the things God has been digging up in me! So here it is I’m about to get really raw and vulnerable in this post!
A few days before leaving for the race I began praying and almost begging God to completely rock my world. I asked Him to break me of the things I always believed I was and to reveal the truths that He says about me. I wanted Him to shake everything in me that could be shaken, I wanted to find peace in releasing all of my insecurities! I wanted all of these things but I never imagined some of them would happen so soon. I never knew that by week 2 I would already be wrecked!
We began digging last monday, and my team and I decided that by digging holes and removing dirt it was almost a foreshadow of what was to come in our own lives. We all agreed that by doing this manual labor God was about to do some labor in us spiritually. So as the days went on things started to change, things started to grow inside of me and I was having to share things with my teammates that I didn’t ever imagine. I guess I just figured I could get through a few months without them seeing all of my dirt. I was wrong!
Just as we were almost finished digging the holes for the columns our contact came and told us that they mis-calculated and we needed to dig 5 holes instead of 4 so we were going to have to cover up a couple of the holes we had already dug and dig 3 more. We all tried to find the meaning in all of this and why it was happening and we tried to find the joy in it. Even though we all wanted to give up we kept going and decided to be joyful in all of this because God works all things out for His good.
As we were re-digging the holes I was standing in the bottom of a 3 meter deep hole and the Lord met me there, He met me in the depths of that empty hole. He showed me who I was and who I was becoming! I had just dug out things I had carried around for years, all of my insecurities had just been removed and all that was left was an empty hole just big enough for Him to climb into and meet me there with more love than I could ever imagine!
As I stood there crying I knew He was about to do exactly what i had prayed for, He was about to rock my world and shake everything that could be shaken. Since that day I cried more than I think I ever have, but it is all for His good. I’m realizing that He is perfect in my weakness. I’m discovering that His beauty really does reside in me and His joy is radiating off of me. He is teaching me about His love and that He loves me more than anything and He is constantly pursuing me! He has made me to be a Kingdom Warrior! He did not create me with insecurities, those were placed there by the enemy. Words that i have carried from people in the past have now been cleaned out! I no longer have to answer to those words I only have to answer to Him and His truth.
Now that the holes have been dug out we are getting ready to pour the foundation. The new foundation will be strong and steady, it will not crumble at the sight of trouble but it will remain strong through all things. I believe in laying the foundation of this church God will be laying a new foundation in me. A foundation that will be unshakeable and immoveable! A foundation that will no longer crack or break when giants walk on it.
I have set the Lord always before me
Because He is at my right hand,
I will NOT be shaken
Psalm 16:8
I’m blessed to get to be a part of this new thing happening here at Dios Es Amor, and I’m so thankful that God is using it to teach me and show me new things.
