BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!
I roll over trying to figure out what’s going on. Through the fog consuming my mind, I realize it’s my alarm. Not wanting to get out of bed, or even move, I press snooze and return to my happy place.
Ten minutes later…
BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!
What’s that noise? Why is it beeping again?
I press snooze again. But this time I try to collect my thoughts.
Just when the alarm starts going off again, it hit me. IT’S MY MISHA DAY. I look at my watch. It’s 6:50.
I stumble out of bed, hobble to the bathroom, brush my teeth, and make my way downstairs.
As soon as I open the door to Misha’s room, a 50-pound bundle of joy leaps from behind the door and onto my chest. No doubt in my mind, this “little girl” is a morning person.
Slightly frustrated she has so much energy, I quietly yell at her to calm down and then grab her leash to take her outside.
With the energy increasing by the minute, I decide its time for us to go on a run. I love running and Misha loves being outside so it’s a win- win situation. I put on my tennis shoes, convince a friend to come with me, snatch a few extra Misha poop bags, and make my way to the door.
I can only imagine the thoughts going through her head as she sees me grab the leash.
I can’t wait to get out of this house. Freedom. Friends. Playtime. Mud. So much is waiting for me behind that brown door.
Misha immediately takes off, pulling me behind her. I try to get her to stay by my side and relax, but her senses seem to overtake any rational thought or command she knows. As she bounds from one side of the street to the other, the leash gets tighter on her neck. Instead of easing up at the pain, she pulls harder and continues to hurt herself. I began to get annoyed with her.
Why is she not listening to me? Why does she keep causing herself pain?
And then I think of my relationship with the Lord.
I cannot count the times the Lord has taught me something and then has given me the freedom to walk it out.
Sometimes, I walk in obedience. I listen to his commands, feel his gentle touch, and follow in submission.
But then there are other times that I do the complete opposite. As soon as the Freedom Door is opened, I take off running in my own direction. I comply with my selfish desires, which lead me to much pain. Often times, even when I feel the pain, I continue on my own way. In that moment, my own will supersedes the will of the Father leading me down a path of hurts and emptiness.
All the while, the Lord has patience with me.
Every step I take, the Lord takes with me. When I start to mess up, he extends an endless amount of grace. And when he needs to correct me, he does it in love.
My God is overflowing with grace and love.
Day after day, he looks past my ridiculous behavior and sees my heart.
When I snap back to reality, I see Misha sniffing some unknown foreign object. Instead of yelling at her to stop, I walk over to her and give her a kiss on the top of the head. My heart grows for her and my patience increases.
And then I look up and thank my heavenly Father for this reminder of His love for me.
