The past week and a half has been a huge blessing. Keith and I came home to Indiana Thursday night to surprise my parents Friday morning. My mom’s reaction made coming home early and driving all night completely worth it.
Between introducing Keith to my family and spending time with people I care so much about I started to feel anxious. I would smile and say how excited I am to launch but underneath it all I felt so afraid. I was afraid of leaving my family. I was scared of leaving the country. I was scared of being away from my friends in Charlotte, Elevation, and Keith. Friday night I sat by the campfire with Keith and lost it.
Saturday morning, we decided to go walk by the lake and I was finally able to sit and listen to what God was speaking to me. I flipped my bible open and read 1 Corinthians 2:1-5. God was speaking straight to my fear. 1 Corinthians 2:3 says “I came to you in weakness with great fear and trembling.” Wow, Paul was feeling the same way I was! Paul who God used in amazing ways was scared too. He remained faithful so that others faith might be increased.
The bible is full of stories of people who are fearful. My church did a sermon series recently about fear. Pastor Steven spoke on 1 Kings 18:46-19:5 during the second week. Elijah is afraid in that passage. Pastor reminded us that God doesn’t use people who are fearless; he uses those who are faithful! When we are feeling fearful, we need to be fed by spending time in the word. We have to feed our faith until it overpowers our fears.
I don’t want to be controlled by my fears. God has been showing me lately that my simple obedience can inspire others to do what He is calling them to do. My campus pastor, Larry Brey, called it “borrowing faith”. If my story inspires one person to be who God calls them to be then it’s worth it. I want to follow what he is calling me to do to bring glory to him.
The newspaper in the town I grew up in did a great article on my story. It was the front page of the Sunday paper! Talk about opportunity. I pray glory was brought to God through it and someone was encouraged through it. You can check it out here by subscribing for a $1 for the day.
Thank you to everyone who has been so encouraging this past week! Thank you to those who have let me know the impact my story is making on them. Thank you God for showing me that it’s ok to be fearful. I love that he is teaching me so much already. This is going to be a crazy ride.
Please continue to pray for my squad and me. We report to Chicago on September 4th and 5th for launch. Pray for peace over the next couple weeks as I prepare for the race and spend time with family and friends.
Heart and Soul,
Kristi
