Training Camp
So not really sure where to start on training camp… was I excited no, I packed the day I left. Was I nervous no… I had some squadmates stay a few days before training camp and that went great so any nerves that I did have were settled and I felt that I belonged and had a place already.
As I am writing this I think the only feeling that I can pinpoint is apathy… and for those of yall who do not know me apathy is my biggest enemy. It gets me every time. My intentions are pretty good, actually great—wicked still, that is out nature—but in reality my intentions get me nowhere and apathy doesn’t help. I wonder if apathy is a way that I protect myself?! A defense mechanism that prevents me from, getting involved and caring too much which leads to a place of getting hurt or disappointed…. Or it could be that I am lazy or simply not motivated. Something to blog about later I am sure.
So in go into training camp apathetic and on guard. I am on guard because in all honesty—and for some this is going to be a shock, others not so much—but I wasn’t all in yet. I knew that the World Race is what the Lord wants for me, he has been consistent in revealing that (maybe a blog on that later?!) but I still had doubts, reservations and concerns. Those doubts, reservations and concerns weren’t about the world race itself and they still aren’t, it is with Adventure in Missions (AIM) and how they practice, which is very Holy Spirit led. And please know that I believe in the Holy Spirit, that he is alive, present and active, but I believe that doctrine gives us the framework for the Holy Spirit. Yet recently I was reminded that we serve a supernatural God who isn’t bounded by anything.
I am that I wouldn’t call myself a person led by the spirit. I am not sure who is “right” in all of this. Basically what I have come to is that Holy Spirit led it is just like another denomination and AIM practices differently than what I am use to. And for a person like me that loves black and white, Holy Spirit is very gray and there is a lot more discernment and knowledge needed. And I definitely lack in the knowledge of scripture department and could always use more discernment. Disclaimer: in going on the World Race I am NOT saying yes to how AIM practices. Ultimately we believe that Jesus is the way, the truth and life no one can enter except through me (John 14:6); and that we are saved my grace through faith (Ephesian 2:8). Yet there are certain things I just don’t “sit with.”
I would love to say that training camp helped with all of that but it didn’t. Training camp as a whole put me more on edge. It wasn’t the sleeping in tents, or sleeping on a school bus floor crammed underneath the seat and feet of two people plus the 52 people and packs around me, or sleeping on a tarp sharing a sleeping bag with a squad mates. What put me more on edge and led to another spiral of doubt was the spiritual aspect of training camp. It was nothing like I experience at home, but I have experienced it, seen it, but definitely not at this level. It was very charismatic, yet in that there were, walls broken, people set free, hearts changed, a new love cultivated for the Creator God. These fruits are undeniable. The fruits gave me some hope and encouragement and a little trust was gained with AIM but that wasn’t what helped still my mind or get me excited about partnering with AIM. My team is where I had the ah ha moment. I instantly felt more at peace and it was another confirmation, yet what’s crazy in all of this I had yet to have a real conversation with anyone on my team.
The day that I got my team was the first time that week I felt excitement, I stopped counting down the days till I get home and was sad to leave them! So with that being said meet my team… Team Go’el which means Redeemer. We have all experienced redemption through Christ and in all reality are still being redeemed to the Lord, know that he is the only one who can redeem. We want to bring the Redeemer to the nations and watch others redemption through Jesus Christ. Our team “verse” is really the whole chapter of Isaiah 62 but we specifically love v.12 “They will be called the Holy People, the Redeemed of the Lord; and you will be called Sought After, the City No Longer Deserted.” AIM offers an awesome opportunity for others to adopt a team. If you are interested in learning about the team adoption program and possibly adopting our team click the following link. http://www.theworldrace.org/?subtab=adopt-a-team&tab=teams
