Just when I am starting to have fun, we are leaving town. I spent this entire month grumbling about ministry and counting the minutes until house to house visits would be over. I can with confidence say that this has been the most challenging month of the World Race. It only took 3 weeks and a packed bag for me to realize that I got everything I asked for…
We have been serving in a place that has never seen “mzungus”, is not interested in the Gospel of Jesus, and barely understands my “mother tongue.” Quite honestly, I have dreaded most days. But as I lay in bed avoiding sleep hoping to snooze on the 12 hour bus ride that awaits me at 5a.m; I am realizing that I spent an entire month wishing away what I’ve always prayed for. I have been given the opportunity to live among a truly “unreached people group”, a place that is saturated with Islamic beliefs mixed with a weekly trip to the local witch doctor.
Tabora is a place that produces the kinds of blogs that excited me most about the World Race. Yet, as I have walked in a dark corner of the globe, I said “God Bless You” and wished the day away. When I should have been on my knees praying for these people, I was checking the calendar and whipping up a half-hearted sermon in 15 minutes. I have prayed for brokenness and complete dependence on Jesus, and I finally got it. There were so many moments when I truly had no energy (or desire) to press on, and in that God was made stronger.
I have been blessed with the opportunity to sit in the homes of muslims and share with them the grace of Jesus Christ. I have prayed for the wives of witch doctors and discussed the bible with their husbands. I have been in a place of complete discomfort and distress. Just when I am getting a small taste of everything Paul was talking about, I am leaving town. I wish I could say that I took joyful advantage of every opportunity to share the love of Jesus. Sometimes I did, but most of the time I did it out of obedience, rather than delight. I saw women come to Christ, and men soften their hearts to the Love of God. I started this month thinking I couldn’t wait to leave this place. And on the eve of my departure I keep thinking how much more I could have enjoyed it here in Tabora.
I have learned the importance of Jesus Christ on the cross on a whole new level. I never thought I would say it, but I am grateful that God brought me to this place of brokenness. There is so much that I cannot understand, (poverty stricken homes, a malnourished toddler with a protruding belly, witch doctors with mansions) but what I can understand is that Jesus is enough, and He is all we need. So even in my crappy attitude and somber spirit, Jesus has the victory and gets ALL the Glory!
What a MIGHTY GOD we Serve!
