I heard a sermon a few weeks ago that asked if we actually had enough faith in God that He would really perform miracles through us. Do we really believe that the God that we claim to have faith in has the attributes of being alive, unconditionally loving, and powerful? Do you really believe it in your heart or just your head?
Those thoughts kept floating around and I questioned myself as I drank tea in the mornings and prayed.
A few days later, I was sipping tea and praying when I asked God to open my eyes to see someone specific that day.
Later that afternoon, I was walking along a street in downtown Portland and I saw a homeless lady, probably in her late 60’s/ early 70’s, sitting on a walker, begging for money. This hit me. I do not know her story, but what little I could pick up on struck me. I stopped and asked if she would like a granola bar. She replied that she probably would not be able to chew it because she has bad teeth. I held up a chewy bar and offered it to her in case she would like to try.
The entire time she never looked up or made eye contact with me.
Did she know she was loved by our heavenly Father? Did she know that she is worthy and worth so much more than having to beg? Did I believe God could heal her in whatever way she needed and I could be that vessel?
I did not have a lot of time, so I had to leave, but I prayed for her as I was walking and I have continued to pray for her as I drink tea in the mornings.
I was once again at church when I got back to Durango and the pastor was talking about boldness and identity. We will begin to share our faith with others when we realize how bold our own story is because we are living out our identity in Christ. If we are still seeking identity in other people, things, achievements, words, actions, accomplishments, etc., you name it, we are not living our lives as boldly as we could. When we have found our identity in Christ, we have faith that God is going to move. We feel at peace with setbacks because that is not where our worth comes from and we can hopefully rely that to others.
This sets us free.
I was praying about this over tea with Jesus, and just after, I found a bracelet with the word “free” on it.
When I am desiring to live my life on bold mission for Christ, then I am free.
When I truly believe in God’s power, then I am free.
When I rest in finding my worth in God alone, then I will be free.
So I will continue to sit here and sip tea with Jesus as He reminds me that I am more than the few pounds I gained or the boy who rejected me. I am HIS unique and loved daughter. Upon realizing that identity, I am FREE!
