Training Camp- Copperhill, TN
I came down to training camp terrified. Not even a little bit terrified, we’re talking 100% terrified. Doubt after doubt was running through my head; am I SURE this is where God wants me? Even if He does, am I sure this is where I want to be? The first day was a struggle- everything was so intense and real that I wanted nothing more than to pack up my bag and return home- where it was “safe”.
I remember thinking, “Oh my gosh, this is real. I am actually in Tennessee in the mountains, training to depart for the World Race in a month. WHAT?” Once the newness of it all wore off, and we got into a routine (trust me, I use the word “routine” very loosely) the terror slowly faded away. As the terror faded away, typical me, I started assessing the situation. I came to my wonderful, beautiful conclusion that I am not worthy to be at this camp (sarcasm noted on how awesome my conclusion was, I hope?). Everywhere I looked I saw somebody who, in my eyes, had more to offer these countries than I did. This was a HUGE barrier to me the first couple days of training camp, I remember praying over and over again, “Jesus, do you want me here? How will I ever preach as amazing as … ? How will I ever worship as well as … ? My heart isn’t as good as …’s heart. The attacks and lies were never-ending… Until I had a lovely talk with one of our awesome squad leaders. They were so encouraging, so uplifting, and so refreshing. They reassured me of my calling to do this- they reassured me of MY own skill set; it doesn’t matter what THEY are good at- it matters what I have to offer. (I know the truth is in the Word with all of this, but sometimes, you just need to hear it from someone… ya dig?)
Aside from growing individually in the spirit, I have to give a shout out to Jesus for blessing me with the most amazing squad possible. Since I’ve been here, there has not been one day that I’ve felt alone in this- I have yet to meet a squad-mate that isn’t struggling with some of the same issues and concerns that I am struggling with. I couldn’t be more [insert word of your choice here that is synonymous with PUMPED UP] to go on this journey with incredible men and women of God.
Yes, my friends, meet my family- the DUB SQUAD.
Jesus doesn’t care that I didn’t go to Bible College, that I didn’t grow up in a charasmatic church, that I don’t always know what I’m talking about… He cares that my heart wants to serve the underpriviledged of this world.
“I tell you the truth, whatever you did for the least of these, you did for me.” Matthew 25:40
“I tell you the truth, whatever you did for the least of these, you did for me.” Matthew 25:40
