My heart broke. Right there, unexpectedly,
unreserved, it broke. I sat in feedback tonight the same way I have 6 nights a
week for the past 6 ½ months, but tonight was different, tonight God answered
my prayers.
For 2 or 3 days my body and me haven’t
exactly been the best of friends. My planters wart has been in a lot of pain,
even when I am immobile, and I discovered that I have pink eye. I also stepped
on barbed wire with the same foot that was already in pain and I was shocked by
an electric fly swatter on the finger. To say the least I was done, I had
thrown my hands up to the possibility of being well. What I didn’t realize
until tonight was that my body was a picture of the body of my team, my family.
Small grievances were infecting our family.
The little things here and there kept coming up and until tonight we only saw
them for that, little. But there was a much bigger root, the infection was
spreading rapidly and if we continued to ignore it it was going to kill us.
Healing Hurricane has been a team for 3 ½
months now and God has been growing us together and refining our family
culture. Part of that culture is feedback; a time when we come together to
encourage each other and call each other into greatness by calling out those
things that don’t represent Christ. With the exception of a handful of days the
boat hasn’t been rocked too much, we haven’t really been getting to the roots
of the pain and hurt, we have simply skimmed the surface.
Before
I was a part of this team the Lord put on my heart that I would need to be
vulnerable and push my team to those deeper places. For the first month I was
but when others vulnerability didn’t look the way I expected, I shut down. And
for 2 months we would only go so far. This month God sparked something in all
of us, something that pushed us off the cliff forcing us to trust Him and each
other. A few days ago I went to feedback and challenged us to pray about
getting to that deeper place, the place where we call out the roots and God can
heal those places in our lives. We all agreed to spend the week interceding on
behalf of each other and four days later God delivered.
Tonight at feedback the little infections
ran rampant throughout our team. We could no longer ignore that something more
was going on, something needed to change. As we sat there awkwardly trying to
move on from the hard stuff that was being said, God broke my heart. I held
back tears for as long as I could but then they started flowing and wouldn’t
stop. God pressed on my heart that we could not go to bed without beginning to
heal this disease that was taking over.
While some of us spoke one on one, myself
and the rest of my team interceded on behalf of our family. I couldn’t stop
crying. My heart hurt for my family. As we prayed and sang and cried, God
flooded us with His peace and His strength. He has called us to fight for each
other and fight is what we will continue to do. We will fight for more freedom,
for the roots to come up, the infections to flee, the chains to be broken, and
for hearts to be healed. That process began tonight, through brokenness, He
began to heal.
Please keep us in your prayers as we go
deeper with each other and with our Father.
Many blessings,
Kim
