“Grass ain’t always greener on the other side, it’s green where you water it”
This month my team is in a village west of Kathmandu. We are living with a host family that has a son our age named Subas. His mom, Bhim, makes delicious food, and we have been eating lots of roti(bread), curry, potatoes, noodles, and drinking lots of tea. Meag, our host dad, has participated in a facemask night, has given us some nicknames, and greets us big hugs when he sees us. We’ve done a lot of walking and I feel like I have seen a lot of Nepal’s villages and crop areas. I tried sugar cane right out of the ground and we chased and caught a chicken and a bunny on two different occasions. I wear a facemask when we walk outside because the dust is so bad. Every night we layer on the blankets because it’s the coldest we’ve been in awhile. I have had ample time for quiet time and reading and every morning we do worship together as a team. We sit a lot too. Ministry this month isn’t exactly clear. We’ve prayed over lots of Hindu and Buddhist temples that we go and visit. We will be teaching at a primary school sometime this month. We’ve done some home visits and we have plans to speak at a university and we’ve also done lots of farming stuff on a pig farm.
That’s all great. But I really want to go home. It’s heading into the holidays and the realization that I will not be home for Christmas has begun to weigh heavy on my heart.
Why am I in Nepal?
I have been reading in Hosea 2 recently. I have learned that God isn’t okay with me living a life apart from him.
Therefore I will block her path with thornbushes; I will wall her in so that she cannot find her way. She will chase after her lovers but not catch them; she will look for them but not find them. (Hos. 2:6-7)
I am exhausted in Nepal. I am frustrated that ministry on a daily basis isn’t what I think it should look like. I am irritated that I don’t have wifi and access to talking with my mom. I don’t understand why I am here. I am struggling with pride because other teams get to work this month with sex trafficked victims and I am farming. Farming. I feel lonely and confused. All I have this month is God. I am completely away from every other source of comfort and the Lord has my complete attention.
Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the desert (Nepal farm land is close enough) and speak tenderly to her. (Hos. 2:14)
I am starting to experience God as the pursuer of my heart.
“In that day.” Declares the Lord, you will call me ‘my husband’; you will no longer call me ‘my master.’ I will betroth you to me forever; I will betroth you in righteousness and justice, in love and compassion.” (Hos. 2:16, 19)
So this month does not look the way I expected it to. At all. But I get the joy of using this month to worship Jesus and minister to His heart. I am determined to choose that joy. I was created for romance and this month I get to spend it with the only one that can offer it to me consistently and deeply. The “Grass ain’t always greener on the other side, it’s green where you water it.” This month’s ministry might not look like the way I expected it to. But that doesn’t make it any less important. The Lord is pursuing me and covering me with love and I consider this preparation for the future. I am watering the grass here and get to give my whole self to this ministry. SO… bring on the pig farming.
Abba, here I am. Use me in this ministry in Nepal. Lord, romance me.
