this blog contains personal vision
I walked into the Awakening with wanting to understand what I am created for. I know who I am but what truly drives me. As I said before in the previous blog I was feeling dry and needed a supernatural lift from the Lord.
The buzz filled the air of people getting excited about their futures and dreams that the Lord has given them. I felt lost as I sat in Jimmy’s lecture, “Life after the race.� I came out wondering what am I going to do with my life.
For the next two days I went in a tailspin of thoughts of who I am really and what I am good at and I forgot my vision.
Yesterday, I went out with some of my M squad mates and they were all raving about Seth Barnes seminar on “Kingdom dreams�. I personally decided not to go because I claimed in that moment that I did not have a dream. I have always adopted other people’s dreams. In fact give me an idea and I will run with it but I am not good with coming up with dreams on my own.
I sat in the Subway in Dublin and finally everything I was feeling began to spill out wave after wave, “I don’t have a dream! How can God use me if I don’t know what I must do!â€� I continued, “I know I am passionate and I know I am created to worship, intercede, and love deeply but what is my ultimate purpose. I want to be a David who stands up to the giants, I want to be a Daniel who prays powerfully is expectancy, I want to be Deborah who prophesies and fights a war the Israelite general was to afraid to fight, I want to be Ether who dares to enter the throne room even though she could be killed, I want to be Peter who gave up everything to follow Christ, I want to be Paul who isn’t afraid to speak the truth. I want to be I want to be.“
Hannah and Glenalyn looked into my eyes and both said the same words, “Kerry you are a great Aaron.� Glenalyn continued, “Kerry you may not have a clear directive vision but God has been speaking to you and maybe for this season you are called to support and there is nothing wrong with that. Every ministry needs a Aaron to hold up their hands and be a mouthpiece and that is who you are.�
During the night the Lord woke me up and said, “Kerry I have given you a vision. I have not left you empty handed with no direction at all. Don’t be afraid and learn to embrace the unknown.�
I forgot about my vision. I forgot what the Lord wants to do through me and I decided instead of holding back and keeping this vision for myself that I will share it to the world, blog readers, supporters, friends and family. So this is my heart and this is where the LORD is leading me.
“A few days ago during debrief Mark was speaking about freedom. Afterwards the song Freedom from Jason Upton was being played several times and I decided to lie on the floor because I didn’t want to do anything else. Then the Lord slammed me with a vision.
I saw bright colors and it was like an 80’s light show. I saw several of my World Race family and they all said a statement of truth of who I am and how I have changed them. Next, I saw several other important people like my parents, sister, and friends. Again they all said something important. Soon the group of people began to get bigger and bigger. These were people who I did not recognize or know. Each one said a statement on how I have impacted them. All of the sudden like a flash of lightening the Lord showed me the world and all the continent of North America was filled with people that I Kerry have influenced. Truly this is a humbling experience.
I told my team Arete about the vision the next day and Casondra and Leisa interpret the dream. The lights represented the year I was born. The first groups of people are those who are close to me and have immediate impact on my life. Second group of people are those I have influenced. The world was shown because God has given me a love for the nations and called me to pray and North America filled with people because He has called me to equip the church and send people out.�
I am so thankful that the Lord woke me up at 4am to remind me of this vision. While reading it again I allowed it to sink in and the reality of it hit me hard. I am a woman that is called to disciple and to train people for war. The gospel of Jesus Christ must be preached and Satan will be defeated and God wants me to prepare the next generation for what is in store.
So I may never be a Moses but I will be an Aaron for the kingdom of God.
