[ T r a i n i n g C a m p ]
Training camp was a crazy experience! I have no idea where to start or how to put into words what happened, because so much did happen. Between the 80-degree humidity… sleeping on the ground… minimal sleep… constantly sweating… constantly being hungry… and bucket showers, it’s something I will never forget. You actually find yourself being confident and content, looking and feeling like a “mess.” I can’t pinpoint or even tell you the moment that I just stopped thinking about it. But I can tell you that one of the main things I have struggled with my entire young adulthood and youth is appearance and how I compare to others around me. But somewhere between the lack of showering and never seeing your appearance, I guess I just stopped worrying about what everyone else thinks. And I started focusing on making connections and engaging with all the information that was being thrown at us. Now what I really wasn’t expecting was how overwhelming coming home from training camp was going to be. I constantly felt myself feeling over-dressed and falling back into comparing myself to those around me while sitting in church that Sunday morning. In no way do I think this feeling was intentional. I think it was just God giving me a slight understanding that the family that I was given for the next year is going to be different yet so amazing because I never felt judged or that I needed to fix my hair or that I needed to “look good.”
My father constantly tells me that I am precious and a daughter of God. I love moments like training camp that really remind me that I am beautiful in His eyes, no matter how ridiculous I felt or how sweaty and dirty I was. And that can be hard to believe because all too often my feelings are valid but not always true. When you constantly feel like you have to live up to the world’s standards, you will never measure up. You will always continue to compare and fall short. In training camp, I had a moment. I was sitting there reading a note that my teammates had written for me.
“Ephesians 3:17-19
“I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ.”
You are rooted in my love; my strength is inside of you, your story is so powerful. Kendra do not doubt me. I am your father and you are mine you are so precious to me, walk in my love and in confidence I am using you to show others my love. “
This theme hit me more than once. The constant reminder is that my story doesn’t define me but I can use it to be rooted and confident in who I am. Honestly, I challenge you, religious or not, to remember who you are and stay rooted in that. Remember that you are loved and accepted regardless of the world’s standards. No one is perfect; we are all working in life and it’s okay to be content in where you are.
Being content and in the moment through all the craziness has been a major learning experience for me. I haven’t had much free time since training camp. Between working 40 hours a week, planning a going-away party, organizing a benefit concert, dealing with the emotions of saying goodbye to siblings who are leaving for college, and putting my best friend on a plane to Hawaii; I am frazzled in every way possible. Yet through the last week since I have been home, I have had so many moments that I have just stopped and watched my friends and family and loved it. I look at my family who loves me deeper than I would ever have expected, and my coworkers who bring such laughter and insight. Those rare moments of pausing to see pure joy and laughter in my friend’s eyes are a gift. it’s interesting how the Lord worked in me those 10 days in Georgia. Looking back those days were so fulfilling and yet so draining.
And I will leave you with that…… future racers know that training camp is pretty brutal in parts, but is one of that best experiences and memories in my life. If you are the kind of person who is often hungry, like myself, bring snacks! And lots of granola bars!!
Finally, words on training camp: Embrace it! Everyone is there to grow and learn with their flaws, and they are learning like you. Love them.
SIDE NOTE: We have raised 10,000 dollars!! That is an amazing amount!! I am so grateful for everyone who has had a hand in this! If you would continue to pray for me, I would appreciate it. I am still able to leave on the trip but have just a little under $6,000 to go to be fully funded!
