This morning, when I woke up, fundraising immediately entered my mind– and fear struck me. I got out of bed, made my coffee, got out my devotional book and journal, and sat down to spend time with Abba. My devotional book is titled "Jesus Today: Experiencing Hope Through His Presence." by Sarah Young. It is the sequel to the popular book "Jesus Calling". Today's devotional hit my spirit right where it needed it. I felt like this page was written specifically for me, for this time right now. I wanted to share it with you now.
"I will fight for you; you need only be still. I know how weary you are, My child. You have been struggling just to keep your head above water, and your strength is running low. Now is the time for you to stop striving and let Me fight for you. I know this is not easy for you to do. you feel as though you must keep struggling in order to survive, but I am calling you to rest in Me. I am working on your behalf; so be still, and know that I am God."
I am familiar with the scriptures mentioned in these verses in this paragraph. I have even used them to help encourage others in the past.
"The Lord will fight for you, you need only be still." Exodus 14:14
"Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!"
Psalm 46:10
I thought, "Be still? You want me to be still? How can I possibly be still when I have so much I need to do! I need to fundraise. I have events to plan, people to contact, new ideas to come up with! How can I possibly "be still" when I have so much I need to get done!"
Why does being still have to be so hard?????
I tried to sit in my chair and be still. I tried to quiet my mind and let the Holy Spirit tend to me. I realized that every time I have begun to stress out about fundraising and coming up with different ways to raise money, the Lord has told me to be still.
I am a very active person. When I have something I need to get done, I get it done. I do everything in my power to accomplish my goal in a timely manner. That way, I feel productive. I feel like I have actually done something.
* You know that moment, when you realize as you are writing something that God is speaking to you still. I'm having one of those moments right now.*
As I've been typing, the Lord has made me aware that I am talking about all I can do. I focused on all I need to do. How I do "everything in MY power.", so that I feel productive. Me me me me. My power? psh! I don't have any power. All that I have is all that is within me, and that is Christ! So through Christ I have power, but not my own power! How selfish and inwardly focused I can be!! Ugh!
" I WILL FIGHT FOR YOU!!!"
Maybe I have been "going about this" all the wrong way. I need to put my own ideas aside and focus on what God is doing. Right now, He is telling me to be still, so I am going to focus on that. I am going to learn the art of "being still" and let my Father fight for me. He is going to provide for all my needs. It may not be in the manner I have thought it would be, but His thoughts are higher than my own. His ways are better than mine, after all. 🙂
"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways.' declares the Lord. As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:8-9
