I have had such a hard time thinking of something to write a
blog about. I have never been a writer,
one who puts all of her emotions and feelings on paper, that’s always been my
sisters job J But I know I now have the responsibility to
put my emotions on the line for you, my supporters, my friends and my family. I have spent years now looking at other racers
blogs on this site and each one encouraged me and strengthened my desire to obey him even more.
There would be days I would spend on the
computer laughing and crying as I was reading blog after blog. I hope that my words and blogs can bring you
the same encouragement. My hope is that I am able to bring each and every
one of you into the mission field with me as you read my stories. Because
even as you’re sitting there in your comfortable chair in your warm cozy house,
you are making it possible for me to spread the message of Jesus, to hold the
child that no one wants, to be a friend to the ladies that society deems worthless.
In church this morning we had a guest speaker; Bro. Tommy Moore.
He spoke on Matthew 21:1-16 about Jesus’
triumphant entry into Jerusalem. Riding
on a donkey isn’t the most elegant thing; it’s not something that is fit for a
king. And it’s something that so many of us today give
up. Not that we’re actually going to go
out and ride a donkey, I believe it’s basically walking in Jesus’ footsteps. 1) It brings
humility. You have no idea how
humiliating it is for me to ask for money. I have said before but I have always
been financially independent. I never ask for money from my parents. From the
time I was 16 and had a job, I was providing for myself. Now I did have 2
loving parents that provided for me financially, giving me a roof over my head
and food on my table. But it was the extra things, the things that I wanted
that I would give myself. 2) It brings you
to ministry. I know from the bottom of my heart that I am called to be a
missionary. But that doesn’t mean it comes automatically. It doesn’t mean I don’t
have doubts and insecurities. God you couldn’t have called me to be a missionary.
Do you see how shy and quiet I am? Speaking in front of people? Lord, I can’t
even get up and say a testimony without having a nervous breakdown thinking
about it. 3) It brings you to the cross
and to your destiny. Luke 9:23 Then he said to them all: “Whoever wants to be my
disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me.
Deny
themselves. Not something that the American society is accustomed to. I know I’m
not. No matter how much it hurts and how much I fight it, I am leaving
EVERYTHING behind. My parents, my family, my friends, my security. It’s so hard knowing that I am not going to be
here with them. I’m not here to take care of them. This is my time to fully put my faith in
Jesus, know that HE is the caretaker. I can’t do anything when I’m here anyway,
He is always in control.
My
first deadline is coming up September 29th I need $3500. So feel
free to click the support me link J
P.S.
Keep me in your prayers, you have no idea how close I was to giving up today.
Satan was/is fighting me big time.
