I am more than a little sad to say good bye. I have been saying goodbye for almost a month now. I get choked up every time. A wall of emotion crumbles on top of me and I’m a basket case for a good hour or so. I remind myself that this is just a moment 
in time; that I am excited for what God has for me… and what He wants to do through me. That this is no time to mourn but to rejoice for I know my calling and that God is working in me.
A few weeks or so ago I called into AIM to give a support update. They reminded me of what I already knew. I didn’t have enough funds to launch with the January squad. The reality of it hit really hard and I put my best effort into finding more supporters. God provided a lot of supporters. He’s just that amazing!
Though God did answer my prayers my funds were still short. Significantly short. I started to pray for guidance… I wanted 
answers too. Why bring me this far if I don’t get to go… why have me fall in love with a squad and team just to break my heart. I have no answers, but I do have peace. Peace that does pass all understanding, a peace in my soul that ties town worry and doubt… and lets my excitement for missions (and the World Race) build me up again.
So I am brought to a place of good bye again. I won’t be leaving with the January ’09 H-squad. Once again the wall of emotion crumbles on top of me. But I’m okay. It’s a bittersweet moment. Sad to let them go… but glad to be in God’s hands.
Although I am launching in June with the I-squad, I know I always have a family in the H-squad and my beloved Team B.L.I.N.G. My prayers and absolute excitement are with them. I can’t wait to hear thier stories from the field (I will be watching you). I pray they continue to be a blessing to others as they have been to me. Nothin’ but love for my H-squad, I’ll miss you greatly!
