There I stood in front of the guy that was heading up the team builder(at trainning camp). He just told us to RUN to the stop sign and back holding hands. We had a time limit of 15 minutes. I looked at my team… and internally screamed. I was with athletic people. For fear of looking like the weakling, I said nothing and sucked it up. I grabbed someone’s hand and started to “run” with my group.
Between gasps of air I thought about asking God what he thought he was doing putting me with these girls, but 
for fear I would be wasting precious oxygen, I made a mental note to ask Him later, and continued up the hill that lead to the sign. I was tired by the time we got to the top, and we still had a good distance to the stop sign AND back to go. I knew I was slowing them down.
After we made it to the sign I was wiped out. I was already sore from previous days and I really didn’t feel like running any more. I saw the distance in front me and I got discouraged. My pace was discouraging… my soreness was discouraging, I felt as if I, solely, was holding back the team. My girls were right by my side telling me that I was doing great and keeping a good pace… they checked to see how I was feeling. They did everything right… and I still was feeling less than enthusiastic.
There came a point on the way back where I had to admit to myself that I was the weakest link. I needed their help and I had to trust them to get me to the finish line, without leaving me behind. I stuffed my fears at the beginning of the run because I didn’t want to be that girl that couldn’t do it without exhausting herself. It’s that façade again, trying to be someone that I’m not… even though, in most cases, hiding it does no good anyway. If they didn’t know that this little jaunt would exhaust me… they did within the first 2 minutes.
To jump to the point of the story, I ended up closing my eyes and letting my teammates guide me back. There is a whole heap of metaphors and breakthroughs that are in that simple act but I want to focus on trust and submission. I let their experience in exercise carry me to the finish line. I took my eyes off of the goal and focused on my breathing and footing while letting my sisters take control of the route. If I didn’t eventually close my eyes, I would have held them back the whole way to the finish line.
Seeing the goal didn’t help… it only slowed me down. I had to give up control. I got discouraged even with heaps of encouragement and “pats on the back,” and down right depressed when I realize I the weakest link. Their experience gave me the opportunity to take my eyes off the road and focus on steadied breathing and boldness in my steps. Before I knew it I felt the down hill slope, opened my eyes, and coasted right to the finish line.
I am looking forward to running this next year. I’m going to learn a lot… so I too can be an experienced runner. (Please apply all the above spiritually and physically.)
