I’m 25 days out. In just a few short weeks, I’ll be embarking on a journey and I have absolutely no idea what it will look like. I will travel to the highest mountains, the deepest valleys, the driest deserts, the biggest oceans, and I will come out on the other side completely changed.
This journey I’m going on? It’s not a physical journey. I might be traveling across the world for a year but I know that my spiritual journey will be so much more significant than anything my physical body could experience. My life will radically change and I will be pushed beyond all my limits, having no choice but to rely on God day in and day out. I will come home unrecognizable, his presence will be so tangible in my life. That’s what God promised me. I intend to be intentional with my choices for the next year of my life. I will put aside my weaknesses, my tiredness, my sadness, and my human desires and choose God everyday in every situation.
When I signed up for The World Race, I had no idea that my life would look this different before I even left. I’ve injured my back, I’ve given up my own personal dreams, I’ve lost friends that I thought I would always have, I’ve experienced a level of stress that I’ve never known before, and I’ve struggled with leaving behind a life of guilt and shame. But through it all, my eyes have been glued to God. I’ve been able to look at my life, as chaotic as it might seem, and see it from a different perspective. I used to shut down when something bad happened to me and I would pity myself and soak in my sorrow. 2016 has thrown curveballs at me that I never thought I would have to deal with. My biggest fears and insecurities have been brought to the surface, but even in my lowest moments, I still see God moving. God has given me the grace to “keep my eyes above the waves.” My spirit has found rest in him in circumstances that are above and beyond me. I see that God is calling me to a life greater than the one I am leaving behind. It’s not to say that the things I’ve gone through this year are insignificant, but I’ve learned to grasp onto God’s promises for my life rather than let my circumstances control my life.
God is calling me out. He’s calling me higher. He’s shown me that no fear or insecurity can hold me back. “For He has not given me the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind,” (2 Timothy 1:7).
