As part of the fundraising process Adventures in Missions asks every participant to dive in by closing the bedroom door and opening the Bible… We are given a Bible study to complete with the sole purpose of keeping perspectives straight and the focus on Christ. As you can imagine other things can easily creep into our minds during this time of vulnerability. Pride, anxiety, fear… these are real trials that each of us are facing. We aren’t dreaming of going on mission anymore, but are working and trusting God to provide for us as we prepare.
My three jobs, family obligations, car trouble, and general creative spontaneity has pulled my focus from the Bible study and I have been feeling overwhelmed by the thought of taking on this big beast of an assignment that is fundraising… But today, I cleared my schedule, poured a cup of coffee, shut the bedroom door, and took out my Bible. With my mind jumping in a million directions, I look down at the second part of the Bible Study entitled: Rejecting a Spirit of Anxiety or Worry.
Philippians 4:6-7
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
Question: Where do you struggle in putting these words into practice?
My Answer: I Struggle desperately with praying. Sometimes I honestly expect God to come to me during prayer and maliciously whisper in my ear “Is it not enough for you that I have saved you from the grasp of hell? Why must you ask for more?” I have a tendency to accept what I see as His will and not ask questions. “Your will be done,” I say and turn away thinking I have no sway in the turn of events… But that is not the way of things. I have forgotten that God has NOT saved me so that I may serve him blindly; He has reached down and rescued me out of the purest love imaginable. His nature is not one of malice, but one of grace. He desires that I come to Him and plead my petitions with thankfulness. Is that not what it means to love? I think sometimes we forget the nature of love and lie to ourselves with words like “They don’t care”, “My burden is too large”, or “They have no time to hear.” God has no concept of time. God loves and longs for us to reach for Him transparently, asking for Him as a father to hear our cries and reach down to help us. Prayer is more than I have allowed it to be in my walk with God, and I am going to take it out of the box in which I stuffed it for too long. “Father, be with me.”
This study has broken me and turned my face to look straight into my own doubt. I am so thankful to be partnered with a ministry who points me to the Bible and reminds me of the divine nature of Jesus Christ.
Thank you for reading! 🙂
